Tag Archives: self-care

What is your response?

When someone asks, “How are you doing?” What’s your response?

Alright. Ok. Great. Good. Fine. Not bad. Could be better. Busy. Surviving. Keeping my head above water. Meh. Hanging on. Surviving.

I bet that if you think back to your childhood, your answer was probably almost always ‘Good’ for anyone beyond your parents, who might have gotten a more explicit answer.

For many years of my adult life, I used to respond, ‘Busy, but good’. Then I went to an Ignite presentation by Dean Shareski that he titled, ‘Busy is not a badge of honour’.

That short presentation made me rethink my response. Everyone is busy. It’s not a thing in my life that should define how I’m doing or feeling. When I think back, I can’t remember a time when work wasn’t busy. When I think back to the people who ask me how I’m doing, seldom are they not busy too.

Right now, if you were to ask 10 people, ‘How are you doing?’ And then after their trivial response you replied, ‘No, how are you really doing.’ What kind of responses would you get?

What response would you give to that follow-up question? Really?

A couple days ago I wrote about self care, and making time for yourself. It’s a thought that I keep coming back to. I’m not sure how well people are doing right now?

I’m up every morning by about 5am to write, meditate, and listen to an audio book while exercising. This is my self care. I’m getting on my exercise bike right after I schedule this post. This routine makes me feel good. I have accomplished a few things for myself before I get to work. If I have to work late, I’m not missing my self care.

This makes it easier to say that things are good. That I’m doing well. What about you?

How are you really doing?

Self care

Apparently yesterday was Mental Health (awareness) Day. I didn’t realize until I saw a number of tweets come through my feed. What’s interesting is that two days ago, after coming home from a long week at school, I saw many tweets from educators talking about being exhausted, feeling overwhelmed, and essentially saying, ‘the struggle is real’!

I felt it too, as I shared in this stress-releasing tweet I shared on Thursday:


These are interesting and exhausting times, and overwhelm seems to be palpable to many. So now is a good time to remember the importance of self care. When we care for ourselves, we have more to offer others.

  • Exercise
  • Meditation
  • Walking (for pleasure, not to get somewhere)
  • Hobbies
  • A glass of wine
  • Binging on Netflix
  • Conversations with friends or distant family
  • A technology free dinner with family
  • A good book
  • Creating an upbeat playlist
  • Cuddling with a loved one
  • Ordering in a favourite meal
  • A long shower or bath
  • A funny podcast
  • An extra hour or two of sleep
  • Playing a mindless game
  • Puzzles, crosswords, Sudoko

What you probably don’t need is to spend more time on social media, unless you have a stream that’s intentionally funny or entertaining. You don’t need to think about the work you have to do all weekend, schedule a bit of time and that’s the time to think about it.

When there are many things beyond your control, when spare time seems nonexistent, that’s a hint to make time for yourself. You’ll feel better because of it. You’ll have more energy because of it. And most importantly, you deserve it.

How are you doing?

Really, how are you?

What are you doing to take care of yourself?

Who are you making an effort to connect with, to call rather than text, to see on video rather than just hear on an audio call?

What are your eating habits like?

Are you following an exercise routine? Going for walks?

Are you getting enough sleep?

Are you asking for or seeking help if you need it?

We have more to offer others when we first care for ourselves.

When is your next workout?

Even without dealing with a pandemic, this is a crazy time of year for educators. I will avoid sharing what time I’m writing this, but let’s just say it has been a long day! I bet 2/3rds or more educators can’t believe it’s only Thursday, and not the weekend yet!

So with all the craziness of September, who has time for a workout?

You do!

Until January 2019, my pattern was to stop working out during my busy times at school, like September and report card time. Then I realized that fair weather fitness wasn’t fitness. I decided that if I wanted to be healthy, I had to be consistent. So I stopped letting ‘busy’ stop me from working out.

The result: more energy, and more to give! More vibrancy, and a great feeling that I’m actually caring for both my current and future self.

Busy times aren’t times to push heavy weights, run longer, or ride faster. Its dedicating small windows of time to self care. It’s about raising the heartbeat, walking when you’re too tired to run, and maintaining a level of fitness at a time when it’s easy to forget to take care of yourself.

If fitness isn’t a priority when you are ‘too busy’ then it’s not a priority. Period.

You deserve to treat yourself better than that. So, when is your next workout?

Slowly getting back to my routine

Morning meditations, writing, and workouts have started back for me as I head into the routines of school days. While I’ve enjoyed the time to sleep in, and move my schedule around, I also missed the consistency of starting my day in the same way. What I haven’t yet done is get through the routine in a timely way. Yesterday, I started working right when I got up. Today I spent a fair bit of time distracted.

I know I’ll get ‘dialled in’ soon, but it has been a slow start for me. It’s weird how this is totally something I want to do, yet it’s still taking me time to get to it. What is it about our nature that we like routines yet we take so much time to get into them? Is it just me, or do others find the same?

Starting with yourself

“To you love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.” Oscar Wilde

This quote was said in my daily meditation today on the Calm App. It struck me as something that is so easy to forget. We strive to be better. We are never satisfied with where and who we are. We want to be better, fitter, thinner, wiser, more in control, less wasteful, happier, kinder, more than we are.

This striving to be more than we are is good… as long as we are also happy with who we are right now. Without acceptance of ourselves we can’t be our best selves. Say that out loud and let it sink in:

“Without acceptance of ourselves we can’t be our best selves.”

Who admires you most? See yourself through their eyes for just a moment… Now let that moment linger for a while. Celebrate who you are. You don’t have to share that you are doing this with anyone, but if you honestly do this, you will be putting your best self forward into the world.

Bitter Sweet

I’ve been listening to Bitter Sweet Symphony by The Verve for about a month now, every time I do my chin-ups.

Sometimes I get a song in my head and I just want to hear it again and again when I’m doing a specific task. When I do plank workouts, it’s Eminem’s Lose Yourself. And when I write, it’s a lyric-less song called ‘Nerve Centre’ on the Calm meditation app. I’m listening to this now, too late on Thursday night, because I can’t sleep.

Tomorrow is bitter sweet. For the past 2 years I’ve been principal of 3 completely different schools: An online school, a small innovative, uniquely structured, but ‘regular’ school, and an alternate school. These schools have nothing much in common except for being in the same building… and having me as Principal. After tomorrow, I’m no longer in charge of the alternate school.

I’ve been needing a change. The role has been exhausting and 2 years in it hasn’t gotten easier. It has been too much, and I always feel I’m letting at least one school down. So, although I’ll be adding some additional responsibilities, I know after 2 years, I will have more balance. But more importantly, I know I can do more for my schools and feel good about that.

So why is this bitter sweet? Where is the bitter part? I’m leaving a school with students I’ve connected with; I’m leaving a school I wish I did more for. I feel guilt that I feel relieved.

But I felt ready to quit a year ago. I was at my ropes end (figuratively only). What kept me going was my early morning fitness and meditation routine, my audio book consumption, and my healthy time restricted eating routine. Last summer, I added this daily blog. With these routines I created something outside of my work schedule that encouraged self-care. They gave me sustenance when my work scheduled didn’t.

It seems counterintuitive, that adding a bunch of extra routines helped me manage my busy schedule better, but they have strengthened my skills as an educator and a leader. I’m fitter and have more energy. I’m listening to non-fiction books that I constantly connect to my job. I reflect on my learning and life lessons here on my blog. And, I’m sure my daily meditation is helping too, although I still can’t calm my monkey brain down and concentrate on my breathing for longer than a minute, even after trying daily for over a year.

I look forward to dedicating more time to my 2 schools after tomorrow. I know this is a good thing… But Friday… Friday is going to be bitter sweet.

The best time is now quote

Just Do It!

It’s really easy to say the words, ‘just do it’. But I bet that sometimes you feel more like this…

…than you feel inspired to get things done. Meanwhile, getting things done can be a powerful motivator, a self-rewarding accomplishment, that helps you get more things done. On this first day of the new year resolutions are made as people aspire to make positive changes for the new year. Some will stick, others won’t. Here is a great video to help you think about making good resolutions:

It’s 3am as I write this on New Year’s Day, having done my parental duties driving kids home, and I’m still thinking about my sticker goals for this year. I’m cautious not to make my new goals overly ambitious, while also wanting to up the ante on my 2019 goals that are now routine. For example, I might still give myself a blue sticker on my calendar for every day that I do my 10 min. guided meditation, and maybe a second sticker if I do 10 more minutes unguided.

But that’s enough about me. What about you? What is a goal that you have related to your family, your fitness, your friendship, or your work, that you want to achieve?

The 5 Key Tips that I shared might help you… but ultimately it is up to you. ‘Just Do It’ is an awesome slogan, what can you do to make it work not just for Nike, but for you as well?

The best time to start something new is now!