Monthly Archives: June 2022

Routine woes

It’s the last day of school for teachers, and although I will be in next week I’ve already started to alter my early morning schedule. No workout this morning and the latest I’ve written for this blog on a school day since I started writing daily in the summer of 2019.

This is a bit of a wake up call for me. My pattern for workouts and meditation start to fall apart in the summer when I break my work routine. I don’t want that to happen (again) this summer so I’m going to need to build in a regular routine that works. I used to think routines were boring, now I realize they help me get stuff done.

One routine I broke this year is archery. I haven’t shot arrows in a couple months. I haven’t been upset about it, I let it go because everything felt overwhelming and I decided writing, fitness, and meditation were more important. I hope to build archery back into my summer routine… I just need to figure out what that routine will look like.

I’ve got one more week to figure it out.

Over tired

I crashed and burned when I got home yesterday. Just felt wiped out. Slept for a couple hours on the couch and now it’s after midnight and I can’t sleep.

Two more school days, then another week to clean up and prep for next year. Then my holidays begin. Until then, I need to keep a better pattern of sleep.

I’ve done a lot to take care of myself the last few years and sleep needs to be the next thing I figure out. I used to live easily on 5-6 hours sleep but I need more now, and I’m not getting it. I need to figure out a sleep pattern that is healthy and works for me. And that should start with me not looking at my screen so late… and on that note, it’s time to get some shut-eye!

On bias… continued

I wrote about measuring bias yesterday. This comment by Joe Truss (my uncle) adds a lot to the conversation:

To add to the importance of Dave’s comment: a critical aspect of bias is the effect our local environment and context have on our opinions about what is happening in the world at large. People are very poor natural statisticians. When confronted with two similar events we begin to think ‘this is how it is for everyone’. An even deeper ‘local’ event is when we are upset or depressed, the entire world seems to be in line with our feelings. When we feel bad, the world seems bad. 

See: https://www.ted.com/talks/hans_rosling_the_best_stats_you_ve_ever_seen?language=en

https://www.gapminder.org
Take the awareness test on this link. ;-)}

Take the awareness test. I started guessing correctly not because I expected the result I was guessing, but because I was expecting the result to surprise me. We really aren’t good at estimating statistics and we make so much of the very little data we do know… and this shapes our bias… poorly.

Measuring bias

It’s not easy to see your own biases, and it’s really easy to see others. This in itself is a bias we all hold; This prevents us from measuring bias without bias.

And so, when we hold an ideology, it’s very hard for that ideology to be changed from the outside. A simple conversation won’t do it. It often takes a profound experience. The difference in scale needs to be large, or our own biases prevent us from making the leap.

It’s hard to measure how much our own biases change the way we look at the world, but if you think you see the world as it really is… well then it’s time to look deeply at that bias.

Hot topics and doing your own research

Hot topics

It’s hard to write daily and not touch on hot topics. But I also know that it’s hard to discuss hot topics without being misunderstood or offending people either by intentionally being one-sided or accidentally by making unclear or poor analogies and comparisons. I wrote a whole post today on one such topic then I read and participated in a private conversation with my sisters and deleted the whole post. I didn’t save it to my drafts for later, I deleted it.

There are too many people already writing polarized views on hot topics, completely missing the point that ideas fall on a continuum, on a spectrum. I realize that I’m not knowledgeable enough to share my polarized view. I will upset people, and I will not change any minds… that’s not a good outcome that accomplishes anything.

This is a time for many to speak up, and it makes me feel like I should too. Then I try and realize my voice is the wrong voice. I wish a few more people would think the same way. We have entered a social media culture that says everyone has a voice, and there is a flood of voices not worth listening to.

Do your own research

The solution often given to so many voices sharing information is to ‘do your own research’. What a bunch of bullshit that is… ridiculous advice to solve a problem in an era where anyone can find the information they are looking for to support their already established views. Doing your own research suggests you have the background in doing research, it suggests you can read a scientific paper and understand and meaningfully interpret the data… in a field you probably know very little about.

Yes you can share your opinion, No it doesn’t hold more water than another opinion because you spent 20 minutes or even 2 hours researching it on the internet. Most serious issues are far more complex and nuanced than that. I’m not saying to not do research, however I am saying that you might find research that only supports your bias, and that research may not be interpreted properly by you or the so-called experts you choose to listen to.

It’s extremely unlikely that a blog post from a non-expert is going to change minds unless it’s intentionally deceptive or already leaning in the polarized direction you were considering. So I won’t throw my opinion out into any current polarized arguments right now. I probably will at some point if I’m writing every day, but for now I think I just need to shut up with respect to hot topics. Being vocal might make me feel good but my voice will contribute nothing new, nothing profoundly insightful. It will be nothing but another angry voice screaming on the internet. I haven’t done enough real research to believe I have anything of value to add.

Doing something special

I don’t know how to write this without sounding like it’s bragging, so I’m just going to say it… We run an awesome little school.

It’s not perfect. We have a lot to improve still, but in 10 years we’ve had 10 iterations, tweaking and improving each year. Yes, covid was challenging to deal with but the changes to the way we integrate courses and have students do SCRUM project management have been pretty amazing these past couple years. Student inquiries and their ability to present and make incredible visuals to present with have levelled up considerably. We keep getting better and we are all excited about more updates to our program next year.

So when we finish off a year and our staff get letters and emails like these, it feels pretty good:

There are no words to convey how much we have appreciated all your efforts. Reinventing high school is no small thing. We have had highs and lows but the skills my kids are learning are going to serve them well in college and life. Thank you.

And:

Hi! I’m sure you already know this, but as another school year ends I still feel the need to say what an amazing, life-giving, and nurturing place IHub is and to express my deep thankfulness to everyone who works so hard to make IHub what it is! You’re not simply saving some students from being chewed up and spit out in pieces by a more traditional high school experience for which they are not well suited, you are opening doors that would have been invisible, facilitating adventures of self-discovery that would have been impossible and changing futures. Deep thanks to all of you!!!!!

And this from a excellent student who would be successful no matter where they attended school:

Thank you for a wonderful first year at ihub! I can now say firsthand what an amazing school this is and how it is a perfect fit for me!

Sometimes I end the year dissatisfied that we, that I, didn’t do more. Wishing I’d somehow given more of myself, and contributed more to our students and our community. This year these notes hit me at the right time. I realize that we are doing something special, and while I know there’s more to do, I will head into summer holidays in a couple weeks feeling great about what we’ve been doing and what’s still to come.

Special events

Last night we had our first real ‘live’ event at the school in years. Last week we did our grad in a local theatre, but yesterday’s event was in our own building. We invited our incoming parents and students to an information session, then we had an outdoor BBQ for them and our PAC, followed by our PAC meeting.

While the PAC meeting went on, a group of our current grade 9’s continued the tour and did activities with our new students. Being a very small school, and having students come from across the district, some students are coming to us knowing at most 3 other students, and in some cases like from out of district, they might not know anyone else. An event like this helps calm the nerves for attending in September.

Before the event, our Grade 9’s were so excited that I thought they might scare away the first few kids that arrived. They were thrilled to be running an event like this. But they settled down and were awesome ambassadors to the school. I loved their presentation to the students and parents. It covered our schedule, the kind of courses we have, the culture of the school, activities, and more than a couple laughs.

After 2 years of feeling very locked down, this event was uplifting. It reminded me of the big events we used to run, like our open house that would host over 200 people, and our all-day event for new students. Next year I look forward to our iHub Talks where we bring in guests and have presentations for students and parents, and hosting an inquiry showcase where all our students present their projects to parents and families.

What’s really unique about these experiences are how much our students do to organize the day. Today our school will be given over to students who are running a LARP – a Live Action Role Play. Student organizers have developed the entire storyline, and have fully planned the day. This is a fabulous way to end the school year, and I’m really excited about what next year will bring.

March to your own beat

I love meeting kids who ‘march to the beat of their own drum’. Not just the kid who dresses quirky, or acts like they don’t care… the kid who knows, ‘I’m different and I don’t care’. The kid that doesn’t know any other kid with the same interests and will still pursue those interests with a full commitment.

Most kids aren’t like that. They worry about what their friends will think. They want the same cloths as their peers, or at least the same style, even if they want their outfit to be original. They want to watch the same shows, like the same music, and have the same interests.

I’m talking about those kids that don’t have a care in the world that they are different, not because of an effort to be different, but rather simply by nature. Kids that think, ‘I know others think this is weird, oh well, I like it’. These kids have a confidence about them that they seem too young to have. They don’t put on a persona that they are something they are not. They don’t try to blend in. These kids aren’t opposed to fitting in, they just don’t care if they don’t.

Do you know a kid like this? Spend time with them. They don’t have the pretences of most teens, or most adults, and that carefree attitude that may seem aloof, or even cocky, is actually a strength that we should foster and appreciate. They will find their way, and their way will be different than most… and not only is that ok, it’s something to be encouraged.

Let down

Yesterday I made a decision not to run an online blended program we’ve run for 6 years. It’s a great course but we couldn’t get the attendance to fill it enough the last couple years. The course required the work of a not-for-profit organization organizing community presentations, and they too struggled with supporting our course with such low numbers.

It’s such a let down to take away something good from our roster of courses we offer. It feels worse because I think I could have done more to promote the course and get more students interested. But sometimes it’s important to recognize what your own personal limits are and not chase after something that requires too much work and energy. Schools already offer a version of this class and it’s hard to promote students taking an online and blended class where students need to go to another school to meet. The struggle to get students interested and enrolled was just too high.

And yet I feel disappointed. I feel I’ve let down people. I feel that I’m the reason we failed to fill the course. I think out of everyone, I let down myself the most. On the one hand I absolutely know I could have done more. On the other hand I feel like this wasn’t a year that I could have put more into anything. This doesn’t soften the disappointment much, but it reminds me that I’m better off giving less things 100% effort than spreading myself thin and giving everything 75% or less.

That’s the lesson, but it still stings.

Early morning silence

There is a special kind of quiet in waking up before the birds start chirping. A stillness. My cat knows it’s too early for me to let him out, and he nestles into my lap. The leaves outside are motionless. Even the air feels still, though not stale.

It reminds me of being at a cottage in Ontario. I can imagine the glass-smooth reflection of the water, the quiet of an open, still space. The crispness of the morning air.

It’s like my mind is taking still photographs, witnessing frame after frame, rather than a continuity of time. The silence is the space between the shots.

Silence is the space in between. In between the night and morning. In between the sound of my fingers typing letters. In between sounds of any kind. Silence is a comfortable solitude. Early morning silence is not lonely, it’s comfortable. Silence keeps me company.

There is no better way to start the day, than with early morning silence.