Tag Archives: habits

Updating ‘The long game’

I wrote this in December, while on vacation in Barcelona, about my fitness journey,

Four years. Not 3 or 6 months, not even 1 year, four. I started my fitness journey with a calendar on January 1, 2019. This was my reflection after a year. The path has been a tiny bit bumpy, but overall extremely consistent and without any significant injury as a result of my fitness regimen.

So often people (including me in the past) go on fitness binges and/or eating diets. It’s a race to see results. And while results can come from these brief attempts to improve, unrealistic fitness plans and unsustainable diets eventually lead to a point where they can’t be sustained.

I’m not trying to run ultra marathons or have a bodybuilder physique. I’m actually going to let myself let loose and eat a bit more gluttonous while on vacation. But I’m also going to find time to exercise, I’m going to return home and be more thoughtful about my diet after my vacation. I’m going to keep playing the long game and not worry about minor fluctuations in my schedule. Because while there will be fluctuations, I’m going to keep a schedule of writing, meditation, and exercise. I’m not looking for quick gains, I’m just working on staying on a healthy path, knowing positive results are still to come… in time. Perseverance and the long game are the path I’m on.

I’ve had some physical challenges this year, and still have a long path of recovery, but on reflection I really haven’t been playing the long game I spoke about in December. This year I decided I didn’t need my tracking calendar any longer.

I tracked 4 goals with this calendar for 4 years, 2019-2022, and saw small improvements every year. This year I stopped. I believed the patterns were built. I thought I would maintain my commitments without needing a tracker.

I was wrong.

So I will start again this weekend. I’ll pick up a calendar and track the last 6 months of the year. My 4 positive habits this year will be 3 oldies:

1. Workouts: 20 min. cardio, stretching, and strength training for at least one muscle group.

2. Meditation: 10 min. minimum, and a second sticker if I exceed 20 minutes.

3. Daily writing here on Daily-Ink.

And I’m going to add something new this year.

4. At least 20 min. of writing that isn’t for my blog.

For this last goal, I’m going to shoot for 26 days, or one day a week for the rest of the year… An admittedly low bar, but still 26 more times that I will have written beyond blogging without this goal! I know that while I watch almost no TV and no sports, I still waste time watching a screen (my phone), and I think like the other goals, tracking will inspire me to build and maintain the habit. I want to write more, I haven’t been writing… let’s see if I can develop the habit.

I realize that in playing the long game, gains are slow. I don’t see quick results and I’m not rewarded explicitly for good behaviour and good habits. I need my calendar to keep me honest. I need it to motivate me when I just don’t feel like working out, and to prevent me from skipping days and building bad habits.

I know the calendar motivates me. I know it shows me when I need to metaphorically ‘pull up my socks’ and avoid ‘no dot’, and ‘one dot days‘. And so starting today my calendar shall be resurrected. It’s time to resume effectively playing the long game.

June fatigue

I’m tired. My routines are a mess. I’m playing constant catch-up rather than being on top of things. That’s June in a nutshell. So much to do, so little time.

The good news is that we have grad tomorrow. And while it’s going to be a 12+ hour work day, it’s also going to end on a really positive note. So, as I lay in bed writing something I usually write 16 hours earlier, (if I was on a regular routine), I am thinking about how I can revitalize my routines and and make June a little less crazy.

Routines and positive habits are self-fulfilling. They add energy to the system rather than drain them. And on that note, I need to get off my screen and get enough sleep for a big day. If you see another post in about 8 hours, that’s a good sign that I good to bed and am back on track. Two things that help with June fatigue are my regular routines, and at least 7 hours of sleep. June is now 66.6% done… only 1/3 more to go!

The time myth

“The myth is that there isn’t enough time. There is plenty of time. There isn’t enough focus with the time you have. You win by directing your attention toward better things.” ~ James Clear

it doesn’t matter how good I get at managing time, I am still someone that could focus it better. I woke up at 4:52am this morning, 8 minutes before my alarm. My routine has begun: Wordle to get my mind going, writing (this), meditation, 20 minutes cardio listening to a book or podcast, 10 minutes stretching, 10-15 minutes of strength exercises, and in the shower by 7am. I could be done faster, but this is a great routine, and some days I can be up at 5:30 and still get it all done. Five years ago the only thing I did before heading to work was get ready for work.

So my mornings are routined, and while I could probably do things a little faster, I arrive at work feeling like I’ve already accomplished something good with my day. When I get home, that’s my down time. And some days I can’t get myself to do very much. Sometimes this is totally understandable. Two days ago I didn’t get home until after 7:30pm, after my PAC meeting. And yesterday I didn’t get my writing done in the morning, and had to run a couple interviews that went until 6:30pm, so on both days I basically did nothing beyond work late and catch up on things I missed.

Having said all that, there are definitely days when I can ‘direct my attention toward better things’. Things like getting home in time to go for a walk with my wife. Things like chores that get pushed to the weekends and make them feel like they go by too fast. Things like reading, writing, and being creative. Things that fill my bucket and make me feel like I’m doing ‘better things’ with my time.

Time is limited and finite. We spend a good bit of our time on earth unconscious, a fair bit of time sustaining, cleaning, and caring for our bodies. The time we have left need not always be efficient, but it should be well spent… And when it’s spent focused on a task rather than than being squandered, that’s when it feels like we are really living.

Long slow road

I know it’s going to take time. I know I have to go slow. My herniated disc no longer hurts and I’ve been completely off meds for a week and a half. But I can tell that the pinched nerve in my neck is still an issue. My left arm is still very weak, and I get an annoying tingling sensation in my forearm that feels like a bug landed on me. It happens in the same spot every time and I still slap it like it’s a bug every time I feel it.

I’m back to doing my cardio. I’m stretching every day. But I was on a great path physically that was completely disrupted. I regretfully redistributed some weight that took me 2.5 years to get in the right places, and with my careful path forward it will probably be a year to year and a half to put it back where it belongs.

That’s a bit of a hard realization, although I know it’s the smart thing to do. Younger me would have been determined to speed that up. Younger me would probably have re-injured my disc in the attempt to ‘recover’ faster. The challenge now is to stay the course, keep my positive habits, and stay motivated even when the improvements are too small to see.

I am the tortoise not the hare. The road ahead is long and slow. And there isn’t a finish line as much as there is a healthy and hopefully pain free lifestyle to enjoy along the way.

Un-breaking a break in routines

Yes, I went back home to my parents house after my father’s death, and spent no time alone except sleep and going to the bathroom.

Yes, I’m dealing with a herniated disc and choosing between feeling loopy on drugs or in pain.

Yes, I also fell and it took weeks for my knee to heal because the wound would re-open every time I bent my knee.

Yes, I’ve missed a few days posting here in the last few weeks. I’ve also had the least amount of exercise since I started tracking in January 2019. I’ve also missed more meditations than I have in that same time.

Yes, I’ve missed more work in the past month than I’ve missed in any 10 years of working combined.

Yes, I’m further behind in email than I ever have been… (I’m smart enough not to try to be on email when loopy or in pain).

Yes, I’m really hard on myself when I can’t do the things I think I should be doing.

But I also know how important these routines are for my mental health. It’s 10:45am and I’m finally out of bed and the loopy feeling of the drugs have worn off enough that while I’m not in pain, I feel that I can sit here and write this. I also feel like it’s not safe to walk on a treadmill, like I did for the first time in weeks last night before taking my meds for bed. Sitting in bed this morning I realized that I can lie on the floor and do some stretching. I can definitely meditate. I can listen to my body and go for walks outside, rather than navigating a treadmill.

I can’t rebuild the routines I had before all this just yet, but I can build new routines that keep me thinking positively rather than lying on my back with a pillow below my knees for most of the day. Well, actually that might still be a big part of my coming week, but at least I can (re)build i some routines that make me feel better both physically and mentally.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again… I have tremendous sympathy for anyone who lives with chronic pain. It inspires me to see people who deal with daily or constant pain and still live out their daily lives. For now, I just need to build in some routines that make me feel more human.

I need to un-break my break in routines… not trying to do what I did before… not trying to do too much and setting myself back. Just trying to build a new routine that lets me feel good. On that note, my neck and shoulder have told me that this is enough sitting and typing for a few hours, if not the rest of the day. I’m going to go lay on the floor, listen to some music, stretch and meditate. The best time to start a new habit is right now!

Staying stuck

I’ve just finished listening to Jay Shetty’s audiobook, ‘Think Like a Monk‘, and I’m going through my bookmarks. One worth sharing is,

‘I wish’ is code for ‘I don’t want to do anything differently’.

The word wish is a verb, it’s an action, but a passive one. Wishing doesn’t involve planning, or taking action, or for that matter changing or moving in any way towards the thing you wish for.

Furthermore, the things we wish for often aren’t as desirable as we think. Like all the stories about genies that grant three wishes, the things we think we want might not end up giving us what we really desire. And again, wishing doesn’t make things happen.

Sure we can have positive affirmations, and wishing can help us envision a better future, but it’s our actions that define the kind of future you will have. This brings me to another bookmark,

Who you are is not what you say, but how you behave.

We don’t grow, we don’t ‘unstick’ ourselves from the patterns we are stuck in by wishing our way out. It’s our actions, our behaviours, that help us grow. Still, go ahead and wish upon a falling star or an eyelash, or blowing out birthday candles. By all means feel free to make a wish… but then make plans if you ever want to see that wish come through.

Missed a day

I think I missed my first day of blogging since I started writing daily in early 2019. I’m making up for it by posting twice today. It was a pretty good streak and I’m basically just going to continue on with no intention to let this minor slip change my commitment.

First thing yesterday morning I went to the hospital to visit my dad, came back to my parent’s house at about 5pm with my back/shoulder nerve pain at a high level. I self medicated and then my buddy picked me up to go out for dinner where I had a couple Guinnesses to add to my self-medicating. When I got home I fell asleep on the couch and slept through the night fully clothed from the day.

I’m not sure I could have written anything if I tried at the end of the day. Not blogging first thing in the morning for more than a weekend has made it a bit easier to forget, and I’ve written a few posts just before midnight this past week.

Still, to respect the commitment, I’ll blog again later today… my way of keeping the streak alive. But missing yesterday makes me ask myself, should I keep doing this? Do I need to blog every… single… day? The answer that comes to mind is ‘Yes’. I still find joy in being forced to to think and be creative daily. Like my blog byline says,

“Writing is my artistic expression. My keyboard is my brush. Words are my medium. My blog is my canvas. And committing to writing daily makes me feel like an artist.”

It’s not about the streak, it’s about daily practice, and committing to a task. And so… onwards with the blogging. Apologies to those that receive these via email for the double hit to your inbox in a single day.

Time well wasted

That’s the title of a comedy show and podcast: Time well wasted.

It makes me think, what do we waste our time on? Monday to Thursday I have a time limit set on TikTok because to me 30 minutes on TikTok is entertainment, but more than that is wasted time on a school/work night.

Is binge watching your favourite Netflix series time well spent or wasted? Is a 30 minute nap time well spent or wasted?

I can make a hundred suggestions of things we do, and then ask, “Is this time well spent or wasted?” And in almost every case the answer would or could be “It depends”.

For example: A 30 minute nap could be ‘needed’ to be more productive, or it could be a way to avoid work, or it could simply be a simple pleasure that is absolutely worth doing.

The question is, how good are our rationalizations? Because if you are anything like me, time well wasted isn’t often well wasted, it’s just wasted… and our time is valuable.

Realistic targets

Whenever I see people get on diets or start jumping into crazy workout schedules I think about how long they will last? Is this a lifestyle change or a temporary change? And often the ones that are temporary are focused on unrealistic targets that they are very unlikely to get to.

Have a listen to James Smith’s TikTok about ‘Optimal’ targets (oh, and be prepared for some f-bombs and colourful language):

I wrote a post recently about optimization rather than maximization, and it was somewhat similar, but this really hits the nail on the head.

Good habits, optimizing small patterns of behaviour, and living a good life without ridiculous sacrifices or hours upon hours of relentless dedication. Not 3 hour a day workouts, but at least 45 minutes five days a week. Not broccoli and chicken every day, but being thoughtful about junk food and making smart choices.

Not unachievable targets, but realistic goals over long periods of time where you’ve maintained good habits for eating, sleeping, and working out. Fit for life, not looking fit for my holiday bathing suit. Healthy living, not perfect diets and workouts. Because when the bar is set too high, when you believe the fitness magazines that tell you how to get a 6-pack in 6 weeks, you are not seeing thé tremendous sacrifices those abs require. We need to set a realistic destination, then enjoy the journey.

Sometimes a push is needed

I’m not a fan of the cold. I share this fact openly. I’ve also shared that I do a weekly walk with my buddy Dave called the Coquitlam Crunch. Well here is my text conversation with Dave last night:

I’m going to be totally honest, I was fishing for the opportunity to skip the Crunch. But here’s the thing… it was fine! I dressed warmly, we had ‘clamp-ons’ to put over our shoes to grip the snow, and I’m really glad that we did it. That was crunch number 92 since we started back in January 2021.

It’s good to have friends that don’t let us have the easy out. So often our anticipation and avoidance is actually worse than doing the thing we need to do. And when we don’t want to do it, friends can either help us step up, or they can keep us in the ‘easy zone’. Easy to do and good for us are seldom the same path.

The right friend knows when to push… and that friend is far better than the one letting you off the hook, or worse yet, talking you out of the better path.