Author Archives: David Truss

Performances and life

We watched The Prom last night at Theatre Under The Stars (TUTS). It was an excellent performance, with clever comedy and fun songs. It was also a nice, cool night for outdoor theatre. My wife and I had a wonderful night out.

This morning I thought a little bit about the play’s theme: “The musical follows four Broadway actors lamenting their days of fame, as they travel to the conservative town of Edgewater, Indiana, to help a lesbian student banned from bringing her girlfriend to high school prom.”

While the town is fictional, I can’t help but be disappointed that this story doesn’t play in my mind as an era piece. It doesn’t come off as a 1960’s hick, small town story from yesteryear. Instead, it feels incredibly relevant to some of the stories coming out of small towns, and whole states, south of our Canadian border.

That equality and equity are still basic rights being fought for today is sad to the point of tragic. That there is relevance to the play’s message, and it’s not a piece about a long gone era is upsetting. However this was based on a similar story in a small town in Mississippi in 2010.

2010!

Good theatre tells stories that are relevant, I just wish this performance was less relevant today, and more of a historical telling.

Holiday from the holiday

Ever find that the day after a holiday is a day of recovery? It’s like needing a holiday to rest up from your holiday. I did a few necessary errands, but it’s taken me the whole day to get to my workout and now to writing, and I still haven’t meditated. It’s almost 5pm and I’m making frozen waffles for lunch.

That said, it’s date night at the theatre tonight and so it’s still going to be a great day overall. Yet I can’t help but feel like today was a recovery day. Just wondering if it’s only me or do others struggle with the after-holiday ‘blahs’ even though it feels good to be home?

Attend and amplify

One of the guided mediations that I listen to is Jay Shetty. This morning the topic was ‘Making Memories’. His message: Be present and attend to the experience, amplify your awareness of what you are feeling in the moment, and you’ll have better access to those memories. They will be richer and more powerful, if you attend and amplify.

One of the downsides to this is that traumatic and trying times also tend to heighten our attention and be amplified. That’s why they get played back in our minds so vividly. Then there is the playback that never happened, the dealing with a crappy situation over and over in your mind, wishing you did something differently. Sometimes that playback feels almost as real, and just as frustrating.

Those are the moments I most attempt to control. I work on seeing them in the distance, and in black & white. I try to make them grainy still photos and forgettable. Too many people that don’t deserve my thoughts and attention can take both because dealing with them is a ‘rich’ experience in my mind. Becoming aware if this is key. Recognizing that they are not worth my time and energy is the trigger to un-amplify. Then I have more time to appreciate all the positive things that I should attend to and amplify.

Luxury, therapy, and a good day

Today I splurged and had a relaxing massage that was purely for enjoyment. It was a deep tissue massage and I needed to ask the masseuse to go a little deeper at the start, but then I just sat back and let her do her work. Normally I spend an entire hour with my therapist’s elbows in my back. Today’s massage included arms, hands, legs, and feet. There was time before hand to sit in a hot tub and do a couple cold pool dips (not something I plan to repeat soon, but glad I tried).

Then the massage room had quiet music playing and between camomile and lavender scent, I chose the lavender. It was so nice to sit back and relax, being pampered without thinking about therapy and having to breathe through intense pressure on my back. It took a mindset shift to just enjoy and lap in luxury.

I read a great quote in James Clear’s weekly email newsletter yesterday:

“The question is not: will today be a good day? 

Every day is a good day. 

The question is: how much good will you get out of today?”

I enjoy my therapeutic massages because I suffer with regular back aches and pains, and I could easily have gone into today expecting a similar experience… and I would have been disappointed. Instead I just appreciated what I had. Admittedly this is a lot easier to do, choosing luxury as a mindset, but it’s a good reminder that how we frame things matter.

Today has a lot of good to be found. Tomorrow will be good despite hours of travel time. Regardless of the day, regardless of the challenges, regardless of the unexpected circumstances, we have opportunities to find good in every day.

User Interface and user experience

It’s a delicate balance: providing a multitude of options and also creating a good user interface that isn’t confusing. Today I went to an online menu and there were several options that only showed up as buttons with tiny icons on the top right of the screen. I would never had known there were other options available if my friend hadn’t mentioned these tiny bubbles were whole other menus.

The concept was good, not overwhelming the page with too many options. The interface was bad, putting tiny icons at the top of the page, which I wouldn’t be looking for as I head to the menu. These icons are not what I came to the page to see, and not having them either float on the screen as I scrolled down or added at the bottom of all the other choices, lacked usability.

This is where design thinking, and focusing on the needs of the end user are so important. Why add features a user either doesn’t see or doesn’t know how to access? Why create unnecessary steps, extra features that are challenging to use, or pop up screens that break the flow of creativity or general use? The answer is almost always that the disconnect is unintentional. Good ideas, bad user interface… bad from the perspective of the end user.

The starting question might be ‘what does the user want’? But the question that most needs to be thought about is ‘what is the user experience?’ The experience is what ultimately matters.

Closet foodie

I don’t go around taking pictures of my food every meal, but I love good food, and I’m a foodie at heart. Today we had a simple lunch at a small restaurant a little off the beaten track. Fish tacos and tostadas shared between my wife and I. They were delicious!

They say ‘When in Rome do as the Romans do’. For me, it’s ‘When in Rome eat as the Romans eat’. Or in our this case, as the Mexicans eat.

I remember on our family trip to Costa Rica the only meal I didn’t eat with my family was when they wanted to go shopping and I didn’t. I walked around for a while on my own and found a restaurant on a back street that had locals going in and out. I entered and found a menu only in Spanish. I ordered a simple meal of chicken, beans, rice and a kind of fried yam or sweat potato. It was my favourite meal of the trip.

I want grandma’s special recipe. I want the cheap street food that locals choose. I want the deep fried chicken my mom spends hours cooking in small batches. I want the family’s secret pepper sauce.

Home made.

One-of-a-kind recipes.

Local staples and favourites.

Food for the gods, not fast food, and not ‘made for tourists’. That’s the kind of foodie I am.

Kindness really matters

I wrote about a kind act yesterday, and today I got this image as a Facebook memory:

I believe that kindness can be contagious, it can become memidemic (my word for a positive epidemic). Kindness resonates, it has a frequency that when put out in the world will be picked up by others nearby. Just like a tuning fork of the same frequency will start to vibrate if another tuning fork, similarly tuned, is vibrating nearby, so too does kindness resonate.

Choose kindness today. Even if the kindness is not returned, know that it will resonate and you will be contributing in making the world a better place.

Kindness of strangers

I have a small magnetic wallet at the back of my phone. It holds 4 cards snugly. After work finished, I took my work Mastercard and one other card out, with intentions of replacing them. But before I did, the two remaining cards fell out. I didn’t notice until the end of a busy day where I had been on a long walk and at a shopping mall as well as work and home.

The missing cards were my Visa and my Driver’s license. I quickly put my card on hold, freezing it from use, and started the hunt. I retraced my steps that day and couldn’t find them. Then I was contacted by a postal worker, who found my cards and returned them to my mailbox. He then found me and my wife on Facebook and messaged us both.

I’ve thanked him in a message, but haven’t had communication back yet to find out where they were found.**

There are always reports about scammers, theft, and violence that make the news. It’s just nice to know there are good, kind, thoughtful people out in the world.

____

** Update, he found them in a mailbox near the trail I walked. So it was two good people: the first who put them in the mailbox, and the mail carrier who delivered them to my house!

Waves crashing

I did a quick search to see if I’d shared this story before. I found The ocean calls me and Ocean waves, but not the following, so I’ll contribute further to my stories of the ocean’s grasp on me.

—–

My first decade was spent living a five minute walk from the beach. From that distance, the ocean was a constant sound in the distance. I can only describe the sound with oxymoronic phrases: a dull roar or a gentle rumble. There was no distinct sound of individual waves, only the ever-present whispering thunder. In fact, I often wouldn’t even hear it unless I listened for it, since it was so constant it was as if it wasn’t there.

I remember a couple times when we rented a beach house just steps away from the ocean. I used to love lying in bed and hearing the individual waves crash against the shore. This was a treat. Each crash anew, almost but not quite the same as the last. I enjoyed the sound the waves make as they recede off the beach, followed by the crash of the next wave.

I would fight sleep to listen longer. That’s the memory that sticks with me, being lulled to sleep by the soothing sounds while simultaneously desiring to stay awake… to hear more waves crashing, and receding off of the beach.

To this day I long for the sound of waves crashing. I use this sound as the backdrop to my guided meditation. I am drawn to the beach while others prefer to be poolside. The ocean calls me, and I am happier when close to the vast horizon behind a rumbling shoreline.

All you can eat

We are at a resort and food is included as part of our package. Last night’s dinner was in a market-style restaurant with individual food court like restaurants. I started with a Thia chicken crepe, then had a couple small rolls of sushi, then a small spinach & shrimp salad. That was enough for me. I’ve never been big on dessert, and if I was the meal would have been too much.

It would be so easy to overeat in a place like this. It can be enjoyably gluttonous. The idea is to think in moderation when surrounded by abundance. Not an easy task. Convince yourself to enjoy and stop when full, rather than feel restricted. It’s not fun being in the land of plenty and forcing restraint… so the trick is to make delicious choices, just less of them.

A buffet breakfast can be a delicious omelette, bacon, and some fresh fruit. What about sausages? Pancakes? Dessert? Those are the wrong questions. How was the omelette? Delicious! Sometimes less is more. More healthy, more friendly to your heart and your waste line. Moderation is easier with the right mindset… I’m not restricting myself, I’m eating wonderful meals that aren’t so big that I’m going to feel awful later, either physically or emotionally.

It’s not about all I can eat, it’s about making delicious choices. They don’t all have to be healthy choices, as long as I’m not stuffing my face and my belly… and I’m not intentionally undermining myself with bad choices. Moderation doesn’t need to be a dirty word, it’s a smart word, a word that allows choices and freedom, free from gluttony.

Now, it’s time for breakfast!