I’m so frustrated dealing with injury recovery. I feel like I’m living my life in recovery mode.

Sciatic pain: 4 months of limited cardio, stopped my weekend walks for 5 weeks, and while now pain free, I am still coming back slowly so as not to trigger it again.

Golfer’s elbow: Ongoing. It reminds my that it’s still there every few days.

Teris major (the muscle behind the deltoid on my right shoulder): No idea how I injured it, but it stops me from getting a good night’s sleep, and has forced me to take it easy on all kinds of exercises to avoid pain.

My buddy is coaching me on keeping the weights I do down and focusing on good technique. I’m actually listening rather than being a stubborn fool who just pushes through pain like I’ve done for decades. But, dang, this is mentally tougher than actually pushing myself.

I’ve spent my athletic life being the underdog. I was the smallest kid being picked last on teams until Grade 10. Playing water polo and having the most inefficient swim stroke made me one of the slowest players in the pool… who had to work harder than anyone, with less rest, on every swim set.

I got accustomed to pushing hard to compensate for my shortcomings. What I lacked in talent I made up for with heart and effort. I learned how to push myself… hard! And now I know that this is not the way forward. Now I have to be smarter than to push through pain and injury. I need to be ok with showing up and doing the work that will protect me from future injuries rather than bring them on.

It’s so much easier to say than to do.

If I’m honest, this sucks. A few days ago I mentioned that I’d like to go one week injury free, I concluded in that post,

I’m reminded of the quote, ‘Choose your hard.’

When I’m sedentary my back aches. When I’m working out, different muscles choose to ache. Well, I guess I just have to choose my ache. Yet I’m actually not joking when I say, when I beg, can I please get one week ache free, just to know what that’s like.”

Being constantly in recovery mode is not the kind of hard I want, but it’s the kind of hard I have to face right now. Progress currently isn’t getting better or stronger, it’s not losing ground while I let my body heal. The trick is not to injure anything else in the process.