Fear & Teaching

I just read an interesting article, ‘ChatGPT is going to change education, not destroy it‘, and got to this sentence about a teacher using it in her classroom:

“Not all these approaches will be instantly successful, of course. Donahoe and her students came up with guidelines for using ChatGPT together, but “it may be that we get to the end of this class and I think this absolutely did not work,” she says. “This is still an ongoing experiment.”

The moment I read this I thought, ‘This is a teacher I’d love to work with!’ What’s her approach? Let me summarize it: ‘Here is a new tool, how can I use it in my classroom to help my students learn? Oh, and sometimes what I try won’t work, but if every experiment worked well then we wouldn’t be learning.’

I see so much fear when a new tool enters schools: Ban calculators, ban smartphones, ban Wikipedia, ban Chat GPT… But there are always teachers doing the opposite, wanting to use rather than ban new tools. Teachers who are willing to try new things. Teachers who know that some lessons will flop, and go in unexpected and unintended directions, yet see the value in trying. These teachers can look long term and see the worthy benefits of trying something new, they are unafraid to have a lesson fail on the path of being innovative.

It’s that lack of fear of flopping that I love to see in teachers. There’s a wide gap between, ‘That failed, how embarrassing. I’ll never do that again!’ and ‘Well, that didn’t work! I wonder what I can do next time to make it better?’ The former is quite fixed in their ways, and the latter is considerably more flexible. While fear rules the former, there is a kind of fearlessness in the latter.

Tools like Chat GPT are absolutely going to change education. I’m excited to see some fearless educators figuring out how best to use it, (and many new tools like it), in their classrooms, and with their students. The teachers willing to iterate, try, fail, and learn to use these tools are going to take their students a lot farther and learn a lot more than in places where these tools will be banned, blocked, and shunned.

Health and history

I had a dental cleaning today. I get one every 6 months. As I was sitting in the chair I thought about how far we’ve come in dental hygiene over the last few hundred years. I thought about how debilitating it would have been to need a root canal before root canals were a thing. Tooth aches can be an all consuming pain, and life before dentists could have been an agonizing experience.

So many inventions have saved lives: from penicillin to pacemakers, vaccines to vitamins, antibiotics to aspirin… science and medicine have been invented, created, and discovered to make our lives less painful and a lot safer.

We still have a ways to go with the likes of cancer, multiple sclerosis, Alzheimer’s, and other diseases yet to be beaten, but we’ll get there in my children’s lifetime, if not mine. Technology is getting better and the science of longevity is very promising. Soon our visits to the washroom will be more like doctor visits, with our urine and faeces being sampled and tested by our toilets, and an app on our phones will notify us if there are any health concerns to worry about.

It’s a marvel to think about how much has been done in the world of science and medicine to make our lives healthier and longer. It took a dental assistant getting plaque off of my not-flossed-regularly-enough teeth to help me appreciate the value of modern science. And, I’m happy to report that I’m cavity free!

The gap

I was one of those kids. I got the report card comment that basically said, ‘Not meeting his potential’ on a regular basis. I got ‘A’s if I really enjoyed the class or the teacher, and ‘C’s if I didn’t. Not just in high school, for my undergrad degree in university too. Well, at that point I wasn’t getting the comments, but my marks followed the same pattern. A’s and C’s, and hardly a B in sight.

This is a tough learner profile to work with: “If I care, if I’m interested, I’ll do the work… if I’m not, I’ll do the minimum.’ It’s not inspired. It’s also not bad enough to raise too much concern. Just flying under the radar, doing what needs to be done.

But when I was inspired, I was really inspired. I would go deep, dig right in and learn as much as I could. I’d create projects that teachers would ask to keep as examples. I’d spend 2 hours in the library just perusing books on the bookshelf related to the topic I was researching.

The gap between studying what interested me and what I was doing because it was required by school was massive. I was essentially a light bulb, either on or off, with no dimmer switch. No motivation (off) or fully engaged (on). And not a care about what my marks looked like as a result. I’d look at a ‘C’ and think, ‘Yeah, that’s about right,’ in the same way I’d look at an ‘A’ and think the same.

It took me going back to school at 29 years old to change this. Only heading into teacher education made me think about doing well even if I didn’t enjoy the course.

It’s good sometimes for me to remember that not everyone cares about marks. Not everyone is motivated to do their best. I cared enough to pass but not enough to do well in every course. I’m not the only kid that has ever thought that way. The interesting thing to me is that it wasn’t always the subject matter that drew me in. Sometimes it was the teacher. Good teaching bridged the gap for me.

Teachers who can build those relationships and foster excitement in learning are a real treasure. They are inspiring and make learning fun. They know how to reduce the gap between students doing the minimum and students being motivated to do well. They inspire students to do more and to find greater success than they ever expected.

The teachers that helped me cross that gap are the ones I remember most.

Not Firing All Cylinders

When your body isn’t working as smoothly as it should it’s hard to stay motivated. My back and neck issues continue to plague me, and I find it hard to give 100% to anything I do. My workouts have become mostly cardio and stretching, but at least I can do this maintenance. However it’s not just physical, mentally the injury is wearing me down.

It’s hard to keep my attention on something other than the discomfort and pain I feel. Moments like right now are rare, where I’m not actually aware of my shoulder or arm. I feel normal. But I’m going to get out of bed and slowly the pain will creep in. Still, I’m lucky because yesterday pain is what woke me up, and there was almost no break from it all day.

I have such sympathy and empathy for anyone and everyone that deals with pain regularly. I’m approaching 6 weeks of this and I’m finding it very hard to stay positive. Yet I know this will eventually pass. I know I’ll get all my cylinders up and running again. The trick is to care for myself now, and let my body heal. But until it does, it’s hard to think about other things clearly. When the pain is deep, the pain becomes topical… it sits on my mind and reminds me of its presence… it stays on my mind and doesn’t let me do anything without a reminder that my body is uncomfortable. When my body isn’t running well, neither is my mind, it’s not like they are separate operating systems, they both need to be working well. And that needs to be my main focus.

Based on a true story

I’ve watched a couple movies recently that were both the telling of a stories that were very influential on a global scale. The movies are Tetris and Air Jordan. These are both so iconic that I don’t need to give further explanation.

Both movies are worth watching. They share the backstory you probably didn’t know about a pivotal contract signing that made these products a worldwide phenomenon.

I’m not that much of a fan of these based-on-true-stories movies, and so it was a pleasant surprise that I enjoyed both of these films. Perhaps it’s the fact that these two movies don’t glorify serial killers or dig into crime scenes, which are the kind of stories that dominate this genre. And so these two movies are uplifting, and I really enjoyed them both.

Staying stuck

I’ve just finished listening to Jay Shetty’s audiobook, ‘Think Like a Monk‘, and I’m going through my bookmarks. One worth sharing is,

‘I wish’ is code for ‘I don’t want to do anything differently’.

The word wish is a verb, it’s an action, but a passive one. Wishing doesn’t involve planning, or taking action, or for that matter changing or moving in any way towards the thing you wish for.

Furthermore, the things we wish for often aren’t as desirable as we think. Like all the stories about genies that grant three wishes, the things we think we want might not end up giving us what we really desire. And again, wishing doesn’t make things happen.

Sure we can have positive affirmations, and wishing can help us envision a better future, but it’s our actions that define the kind of future you will have. This brings me to another bookmark,

Who you are is not what you say, but how you behave.

We don’t grow, we don’t ‘unstick’ ourselves from the patterns we are stuck in by wishing our way out. It’s our actions, our behaviours, that help us grow. Still, go ahead and wish upon a falling star or an eyelash, or blowing out birthday candles. By all means feel free to make a wish… but then make plans if you ever want to see that wish come through.

Time in, time out

There is a certain wisdom that comes with age, with the passing of years and the recognition that more than half your life has passed. I’m not talking about how my days are numbered or anything like that, but rather that the time we have left is worth something. So how do we use our time? What do we put time into… and what do we get out of that time?

I have a good job that is in the service of others. I get good job satisfaction out of my work, but I also put a lot of my time into my work. I have an awesome family that I’d like to spend a bit more time with… and do, like our recent vacation to Spain. I have a small group of friends that I definitely want to spend more time with. I have a weekly walk and coffee with a friend, and I have regular events (plays & musicals) where my wife and I go out with 2 other couples we are close to. I have some awesome connections to my wife’s family and we meet for events like a dinner this long weekend. Beyond that I really don’t make time for friendships, and when I do it feels like an effort.

As I get older I’m seeing that the effort to connect with friends and family is vitally important. Vitally as in it fosters vitality. I spend so little time making the effort to connect to others I care about, but those connections are worth the effort. And if you don’t put the time in, you don’t get the reward out. My circle of friends is small, and I don’t want it any smaller. I need to make more time to connect to people whom I value… and who value me.

I need to make the time, because to quote a Canadian band, ‘They say, absence makes the heart grow fungus‘. If I don’t make the effort now, I’m probably not going to make it later, and friendships do not grow stronger out of time apart. New experiences with old friends: that’s what I need more of in my life. And these don’t happen unless someone is making an effort to connect… and more and more I’m realizing that I’m the one that needs to make the effort; to put the time in.

Tattoo number two

It took me over 15 years from the first time I thought about it to finally getting my second tattoo. About 16 or 17 years ago I jammed my ring finger playing basketball and I had issues getting my ring on and off. But when I tried a wider ring I couldn’t close the gap between my ring and pinky fingers and that drove me crazy. So I didn’t wear a ring.

When my wife surprised me for my 40th birthday with a trip to Vegas, I decided one night that I was going to get a ring tattoo. It was a 3am decision and we couldn’t find a place that was open. I tried again one late night in Vancouver, years later. No luck. I was going to go again when covid hit, and that delayed things.

On our recent trip to Barcelona my wife and daughters got tattoos and I had one picked out, but we arrived at the tattoo parlour 40 minutes before closing and they didn’t have time for me after my family got theirs…

It seemed like I was never going to get this tattoo!

Then this past March break I booked an appointment with my friend’s daughter who is a tattoo artist… and I had to cancel when I ended up staying in Toronto longer than originally expected. And now, finally, I got it done! 15+ years in the planning and here it is:

The original rough sketch had two lines going completely around my finger but I didn’t like the way it broke up the first triangle so I left it out at the last minute, knowing it could be added if I didn’t like it as-is. However I really do like it and I’m glad I left that line out. Symbolically, the front triangle is for my wife and the two behind are for my daughters.

I know finger tattoos tend to fade, especially on the palm side, but I wanted the full circle and I’ll let it fade over time naturally. Maybe I’ll get it touched up when I get my 3rd tattoo… but at this rate that could be a decade or two away! 😜

4-day weekend

I’m looking forward to the Easter Break! Having both the Friday and Monday off is a treat. A 3-day weekend is nice, but getting that extra days makes this break special. It becomes a ‘real’ break where I know that I can actually let go of thinking about work. It allows true down time.

I find that a 4th day makes the break into a real holiday… and I can come back to work refreshed. I’d give up my second week of holidays at Christmas so that I could get a few more 4-day weekends throughout the year. I’m not sure that would be popular with everyone, but it would be ideal for me… Mini holidays throughout the year! Am I the only one that thinks this is a good idea?

Maintenance mode

I’ve been struggling with an upper back injury that has involved shooting pains down my shoulder and neck pain and stiffness for over a month now. It’s frustrating. Regular massage and physiotherapy help but so has pain medication. I try to avoid taking painkillers (with chronic back issues there is almost always a reason to take something, so I only do so when the pain is restrictive and unrelenting), but I’ve had no choice the last few weeks.

This has made my fitness routine hard to follow. But I can still get on an exercise bicycle and not hurt my back. I can walk on a treadmill, and my hand movements help loosen my back. Running is out of the question. Still, I can also do leg workouts that don’t involve weights. And of course I can stretch… and need to be stretching.

Fitness isn’t just about constant improvement, it’s also about going into maintenance mode and doing *something* to take care of your body. Fifteen years ago my back would crash and it would takes months to recover. Now, this issue I’m dealing with is the worst I’ve dealt with in years. I know that a focus on fitness is what has reduced my down time, my days feeling hurt enough that pains and discomfort are constantly on my mind. However, the lack of these experiences over the last few years amplifies just how much this bothers me right now.

Yet while the pain is bothersome and pretty consuming, I am thankful that this is now an anomaly and no longer the norm. I’m thankful that I can still get some exercise in and maintain my fitness enough that I’m not having to start over when I recover. A commitment to exercise even when I’m struggling, and to be smart enough not to overdo it or exasperate the injury, helps me stay focused on my long term fitness goals.

It’s not about giving 100% a hundred percent of the time. It’s about showing up every day and doing something to care for myself. Some days that means pushing what I can do. Some days that means choosing one part of my routine to do at maximum effort. And some days that means doing the bare minimum. What’s not a viable option is opting out.