Monthly Archives: April 2021

I got my shot!

Last night I was fortunate enough to get my first Covid-19 vaccine! (I’m actually writing this as I walk home, but it won’t be posted until the morning.)

It was given to me by a second year UBC med student. I hadn’t thought of using medical students to help, that’s a brilliant idea.

While sitting for the obligatory 15 minutes afterwards, I shared this photo on social media:

A good friend asked on Facebook: “Which one did you get Dave?”

My response, “The one I could get… I’m leaving it at that because I want to encourage others to do the same.

It feels great to be one step closer to normalcy,.. and although this won’t change my habits and diligence, it’s still a celebration that we are headed in the right direction. I’ve taken a huge safety precaution for myself, and I’ve also done my civic duty to help protect the more vulnerable members of society.

That’s the post. Now, it’s time to pump up the volume on my headphones, and enjoy the rest of the walk home.

Workday morning routine

I have a pretty good internal clock, and on most days I will wake up before my alarm. Doesn’t matter if I set the time for 4:30am, 5, or 5:30, most days I’ll wake up about 10 to 20 minutes before my phone’s alarm starts to chime. Usually this is great, I can sneak out of bed without disrupting my wife’s sleep too much.

But sometimes this can be a challenge too. When my body wakes me to at 4:10 because my alarm is set for 4:30, it can be hard to get myself out of bed. When my eyes open and I’m exhausted, I find myself hoping that I’m 2 hours early, so that I can justify going back to sleep just a little while longer.

This morning I’m up 15 minutes early. Meditation is done, daily write just about done. This morning’s exercise will be treadmill for cardio then some push-ups and a quick workout of chest and triceps, because that’s what I feel like doing today… 20 minutes aerobic exercise, listening to an audio book, then 2-3 sets of weights/body weight exercise listening to my workout playlist, and not-quite enough stretching added in. Then my shower and grooming before heading to school to start my work day.

Other than an email check including a daily news report that I subscribe to (the only news I get these days, since I don’t watch tv and minimally use social media), and that’s my usual morning routine… A routine that very often starts with me checking the time a few minutes before my alarm goes off.

Now it’s time to go to Pixabay, to choose a cover photo for this post (I limit the search time to 2-4 minutes), then schedule this post and start my exercise routine. And there is my usual start to my workday.

The great outdoors

For the first time since last summer I got on my bike and headed for a ride behind a nearby lake. I forgot how rejuvenating it can be to be in the woods, to hear the rush of water, to see the distant snow covered mountains, and glimpse a waterfall in the distance. All this just a 20 minute drive and 30 minute ride from my house.

I often go for wonderful walks with my wife on the dykes, and in a wooded lot near our house, so it’s not like I don’t ever get out in nature. However today I felt like I was really absorbed into the environment. The world felt so alive.

If you need a pick-me-up, escape into an environment where you are surrounded by nature. Leave you phone in your pocket, and music off. Appreciate the natural world in all its splendour.

Still a rookie

I sometimes need to remind myself that I’m still new to archery. Yesterday I did something bizarre. Twice in less than an hour, I launched an arrow into the wall about 8-10 feet above my target, mid draw. My trigger release didn’t misfire, I somehow pulled back at a bad angle and let the string slip out of the release. Both times I was shocked. Both times I had no idea what I did to cause this. Both times I knew it was human error and not my equipment, but didn’t know what to do differently?

I spent the rest of that practice paying so much attention to my draw that I didn’t shoot very well. Today in practice I looked down at my hands just before I drew and I saw the problem.

Before I begin the draw cycle, I put tension on my bow string to get the feel of my bow into the right spot in my bow hand. I don’t know when I started doing this, but I was pulling on the release with my thumb up. However, the draw cycle involves drawing back with my pinky finger up. So, I’d put tension on the string, thumb up, raise my bow, and as I started my draw cycle I’d have to rotate my wrist 180°. In that process I must have twisted my pinky finger too far back allowing the string to slip out of the release… twice. Two arrows destroyed, and at the time, not a clue why?

Today I shot very poorly in my first round, then mostly much better the second round. Mostly.

I scored a 280 and my personal best is 281. But I don’t see the the good shots, I see the 7 in the red outer circle of the third target.

I don’t see the perfect score in end 2, I see the two 8’s in a row in end 6… the 7 after the two X’s overshadow the X’s in end 8.

Cognitively, I know that I need to ‘let go’ of the mistakes. To learn from them. To not let the previous shot affect the next shot. I like archery because it can sometimes feel like meditation. But then I treat it like a competitive sport and get mad at myself for not being better than I am… Like I’m not still a rookie, learning the ropes and shooting arrows accidentally, because I lack body awareness.

I’m my own worst enemy, placing too much pressure on myself, and not celebrating the successes. I forget that scores under 270 were a regular thing for me just 3 months ago.

I forget that the journey is what matters, and that I’m on a good path to getting better. And I forget that the path will be faster if I focus more on doing things right, again and again, rather than being upset and clouding my brain with unproductive thoughts and feelings.

I’m just a rookie, and I’ve got a lot to learn. 1,000 arrows from now I will be better. How much better? Well, that depends on if I can keep my expectations realistic, and focus on improving rather than beating myself up with unrealistic expectations. 280 is a great score, I only got 281, my personal best, a few days ago. I learned a valuable lesson today, and hopefully won’t ever release an arrow during my draw again. I am getter better!

Shot booked

A moment I’ve been waiting for is now days away. I will get my vaccine on Monday night. I’ll probably walk there, the location is on my street less than 15 minutes away. I haven’t looked forward to something like this since I was a kid going to Disney World.

It feels like this day was never going to come. Now that it’s booked, I am excited for myself, but I also can’t wait for every last person who wants one to get one. I worry about too many people not wanting one, and the continual spread of very contagious variants. I wonder about how long until life resumes to some kind of normal?

But despite all these questions and concerns, a big life moment is happening for me on Monday night. I’ll allow myself to feel the same level of excitement of 9 year old me the night before I flew from Barbados to Orlando, to first go to Disney World and then to move to Toronto, Canada.

It’s celebration time! 😃

A Simple Reset

It took a whiny rant yesterday to help me reset my frame of mind.

I rethought the rut I was in last night, after I had a massage. Usually my massages are painful ordeals, working out deep muscle knots, but most of my discomfort was from muscle soreness from working out. This is really unusual because I generally deal with a lot of back discomfort, verging in pain. So, my workouts haven’t been as lazy as I thought. Then I looked at some not too old archery scores and I truly am happy about where I am right now in my progress.

Sometimes it doesn’t take much to set my brain on a bit of a tailspin, but overall I see myself as a positive and happy person. I work in a school with some truly amazing students and teachers. I have a wonderful office staff. And I come home to an awesome family.

I’m blessed, and when I get into a rut like I did yesterday, I need to get over myself and appreciate how truly lucky I am.

The weather is wonderful all this week, and it’s going to be a great day today!

In a rut

My mind is a flutter. I seem to be hopping from idea to idea. At work my secretaries and I joke about me having a squirrel brain when I get like this. I start a task, get interrupted, and then don’t remember the task until much later. A student comes to ask me a question, and I can’t remember what I was doing after they leave.

Today I had to redo my meditation because I fell asleep. Then the second time the 10 minute session ended I realized I completely failed to listen to the last few minutes or focus on my breathing, and had to go back to it again.

I don’t like when I get like this, because it’s like I’ve had too much coffee, and am overstimulated. But rather than fight it, for today’s post I’ll try to embrace it and I’ll throw ‘this and that’ out in a stream of verbal diarrhea, here goes:

I got my personal best score in archery, beating my old record by one… then repeated that score. I should be thrilled. My accuracy is way up. Yet I’m mad at myself because I started both record-breaking scores with two of three shots being 8’s. And in my second round, I ended with an 8, or I would have beaten my new record rather than tied it. Oh, and I’m also mad at myself because rather than celebrating my personal best, I’m upset about these things and can’t seem to let myself celebrate the success.

Workouts are still floundering, even now I’m writing this later than usual and will have to rush my morning routine. So much for getting back into it like I’ve shared here recently. I tell myself I’ll push harder, but I really don’t. I think I need to try something really different to break this cycle. I’m usually someone that can self-motivate, but right now I feel like I need someone else to light a fire under my ass.

I finally finished a 28.5 hour audio book. It was a wonderful story but it still took me almost three months to listen to, despite enjoying it. I listened to so many books the last couple years, and this year I’m listening at a snail’s pace. I’m also behind on podcasts. I just don’t squeeze the time out of the day like I used to.

I’ve been ‘working on’ a visual that puts together some of the things we do in order to share the Heroes Journey of a student at Inquiry Hub… except I’ve been too busy at work and am actually not working on it. It’s more of a decoration on the whiteboard behind me in my office than it is a work in progress. I look at it, I haven’t really added much to it recently.

My eating habits haven’t been great. My sleeping habits haven’t been great. I’m clueless as to what’s going on in the world because not only do I not watch TV, but I’ve tuned out of social media too.

I sound like a basket case reading this over, but I’ve caught up on my email backlog, and have been tackling my ‘to do’ list at work diligently, even if sometimes lacking focus. I’m functioning pretty well, yet focused on the things I’m not doing rather than the things I’m doing well. I haven’t laughed enough recently. I haven’t felt a sense of real accomplishment. I haven’t even enjoyed my distractions.

Yet, in the grand scheme of things I’m being productive, I’m staying healthy, my family is healthy, I’m listening to good books, I’m meditating, I’m improving my archery skills. There should be a lot to celebrate, or at least appreciate. Cognitively I understand this. But I don’t know how to give myself a break and appreciate all these things?

Well, I better get my butt to my home gym and go through the motions of working out. I’ll listen to a podcast while I do, and maybe some motivational music. I’ll get out of this rut soon, but for now I’ll just go through the motions, which is better than letting myself slip.

Waiting in Limbo

I’ve gotten terribly tired of waiting. I want to stomp my feet, and scrunch up my face, and whine like a petulant child until I get my vaccine. When is it my turn? How much longer? What about me?

Oh, I know that the protocols will still be there; restaurants will still only be takeout; I won’t be suddenly having friends over; and, I’ll still be wearing a mask for some time. I know my day-to-day life won’t change much after my first shot. But getting that shot can’t happen fast enough for me.

It’s the next step forward. Its movement away from a year-plus-long state of limbo, and towards the promise of normalcy… even if we are still far away from things going back to normal.

It’s getting closer to happening but it feels like each day is exponentially longer as I wait my turn. It makes me feel impatient, frustrated, and melancholy. I know that’s all in my head. I know that thinking about it stretches my perception of the days before it happens even longer. That doesn’t seem to matter. What matters is that I’m still waiting. And yes, I’m still being cautious, I’m still trying to stay positive, I’m still taking my Vitamin D… and I’m still waiting.

Results are in

I did DNA testing with 23andMe and the results are in. I didn’t expect or get any surprises in my heritage: I’m 55% Ashkenazi Jew, 20% Chinese, and the remainder is split between British and Southern European. My grandparents are a Polish Jew, a Ukrainian Jew, Chinese, and a mix of English with Spanish and Portuguese (my grandmother who thought her father secretly had some Jewish in him, which could explain the above 50% Jewish results). So, my wife’s description of me as a Chinese Jew from Barbados remains a fitting description.

It’s interesting that the category ‘Ashkenazi Jew’ doesn’t break down further, but even though my two grandfathers lived in neighbouring countries, they seem to have come from the same roots. And having been persecuted and ‘othered’ since the Middle Ages, as well as the desire to marry within their own faith, I’m not surprised that there wasn’t a lot of mixed blood in that part of my heritage.

I’m looking forward to exploring this a little further. I’m also interested in digging into other health aspects of the results.

fitness slump

I recently gave myself a big fitness goal, and then the March Break hit. Week one I stuck with things, week two I took a lazy dive. I’ve been on that lazy dive for a second week and today was supposed to be the day I broke it and started again. It wasn’t.

My motivation seems to be at an all-time low right now. But I know what I need to do. I need to ‘let go’ of the goal, and just get my butt into my gym. I need to allow myself to go through the motions and feel low… but still get in the gym and do something. I didn’t get back to things today. I will get myself back on the treadmill and lifting weights, or doing chin ups, tomorrow morning. Sometimes it’s ok just to go through the motions, but it’s not good to let myself avoid workouts. When I do this, it becomes an unhealthy loop.

So tomorrow morning, I won’t push myself on the treadmill. I’ll do some low weight with high repetition exercises. I’ll add a sticker to my chart, and at least 4 more in the weeks to come, so that I’m back to 5 workouts a week. Hopefully some time this week or next, I’ll feel more motivated and get back to my goal… but for now the goal is to just show up.