Tag Archives: sports

Team Sport Roots

Some days in the gym can feel really strong. My buddy and I were both having one of those workouts yesterday. We both lifted a little heavier than we usually do, and felt strong throughout our sets.

We were discussing how working out with someone is a real motivator compared to working out on our own. It was at this point that I realized we had something in common, and that’s playing competitive team sports.

For both of us, working out with someone and doing more than we would on our own is not about showing off, it has much more to do with giving our best for the team. He’s relying on me to perform well, and I’m wanting to do the same for him.

When you’ve played team sports, you understand that the team relies on you and there is a kind of pressure to be better than if you were just doing the practice, workout, or even game for yourself. There is a mutual understanding that ‘we rely on each other’, and that not giving full effort is letting down everyone, not just yourself.

I wonder if this is something felt greater in people who have been on a competitive team compared to someone else? I wonder if people who choose solo sports rather than team sports get that same boost from some else? Or if they just innately feel that extra push and don’t need an outside influence?

I for one thrive on it. Most of my workouts happen alone, at home, in my basement. There are days I push, and days I kind of just go through the motions. But when I’ve got a workout buddy, that’s the motivation I need to thrive and have a really good workout every time!

The past and the push

When you hear great athletes talk about practice, they know what it means to push themselves. When they miss a shot, lose an easy opportunity, they don’t give up, they don’t negative self-talk, they double down and give more than they thought they could. When they are in a game and everything is on the line… there’s one more offensive rush, one more play to decide the game, they are 100% present with a singular focus.

I’m not a natural athlete, and like I said before, “…sometimes I could get in the zone. Sometimes the game slowed down for me and I could see more action around me. Sometimes I could see the play forming and feel the rhythm of the game. I didn’t have a switch I could turn on, I didn’t know what I could do to put myself in the zone. I didn’t have control of it.”

I wasn’t an athlete that could choose to get into that zone, it found me. And it might not have found me enough, but I have strong memories of those moments, I remember them and how powerful they were. But they are all in the past… and I find that hard. I want those moments again.

Perhaps I need to start archery again? Maybe I just need a regular workout buddy? I don’t know what will get me back to that, being someone who no longer does organized sports? What I do know is that I miss it. This isn’t about regret, it’s like nostalgia, yet different. It’s a yearning to feel the push, to feel the relentless drive, to be a reliable force in the pursuit of excellence.

It’s about feeling the push in the present.

Expectations versus Outcomes

In yesterday’s post, ‘The very best and the second best’ I wrote:

“To one person second best is amazing and to another it is the first loser. It’s the same medal, but it means so much more or less, depending on what they believed they could achieve. It’s a good reminder of what our expectations do to our experience.”

My focus was on gold and silver/first and second place. Manuel Are responded in a LinkedIn comment. He left a wonderful story of EJ Obiena, who was the Philippines representative to the Pole Vault Event in the 2024 Paris Olympics. Obiena placed 4th. Manuel concluded the comment saying,

“Obiena’s emotional response and remarkable progress from 11th to 4th place prompt a reflection on the nature of success in sports. While medals are tangible rewards, the essence of athletic endeavor lies in continuous improvement and the courage to compete on the world stage. His achievements have not only brought attention to pole vaulting in the Philippines but also inspired countless young athletes to dream big. Obiena’s near-miss should be viewed as a stepping stone toward future success, embodying the qualities of a true champion.”

Indeed Manuel, 11th to 4th is a massive feat, and to do this would be the equivalent of winning gold to that athlete with the new achievement.

I think what we are both describing is that the measure of success of the outcome depends on the expectations… and success doesn’t always include winning a medal.

The very best and the second best

I haven’t watched a lot of the Olympics, but I’ve enjoyed everything I have seen. I love watching athletes give everything they have, and finding extra reserves or incredible composure in the face of exceptional competition.

For some athletes who dream of gold, the only acceptable place to come in is first. For others, the silver medal is an incredible achievement, that seemed almost impossible before the competition.

To one person second best is amazing and to another it is the first loser. It’s the same medal, but it means so much more or less, depending on what they believed they could achieve. It’s a good reminder of what our expectations do to our experience.

Wipeouts and learning

I haven’t done a lot of board sports. The last time I stood on a surfboard I was 9, and I was not very good. I didn’t skateboard and I don’t snowboard. I do ski, and I’ve been on water skis a few times, but it has been 3 years since I skied on snow and over 2 decades since I skied on water. So I didn’t expect wake surfing to come naturally to me… and it didn’t.

The one time I actually got up, I was behind the wake, and instead of taking my time to gain some confidence, I raced forward to the front of the wake, and kept going for a nice wipeout.

After about 7 or 8 attempts, I’d had enough and then a few others took turns. Then my friend Mark suggested I try again with a start off of the back of the boat… and I found success.

I had a full 3 and a half minute run, trying my best to put myself in a position where I could actually surf the wave with slack on the rope, with the wave pushing me forward. Although I couldn’t get the knack of it, I had a few near falls trying, and was able to recover and keep trying. A few things helped:

1. Good coaching. Mark was amazing. He was calm, with clear instructions, and good space between coaching to just let me try.

2. Positive cheerleading. Everyone on the boat was rooting for me, and every wipeout was met with encouragement.

3. Watching others. Seeing others both struggle and find success made the task seem like it was something I could accomplish.

4. A willingness to fail. I knew that I wasn’t coming into this with a lot of similar skills, and so a wipeout wasn’t really a failure but a learning opportunity.

But of all these, good coaching was the most critical. A good teacher is a gift.

Winning is Everything

We live in an era of participation awards and consolation prizes. Everyone is a winner… except that’s not true. It takes a special kind of attitude, one that requires you to believe that winning is everything, to get you to the headspace of a winner that actually wins more often.

Great athletes are not satisfied with second place, second place is the first loser. Dedicated athletes are pissed off when they are a fraction slower than their personal best time… Next time… I’m going to hit it next time. I’ve got to give more. The thrill of competing isn’t the the only thrill, it’s the path to the greater thrill of winning, of hitting a personal best… of giving everything you’ve got and being rewarded with success.

Sportsmanship is important, but winning is more important. My opponent is pissed off at me? Good. Let them be angry while I am focussed. Let them worry more about hurting me than on scoring. Let them fear what I’m willing to do that they are not. Anger is weakness and all weaknesses are to be exploited. Celebrate in their faces after scoring. Exude confidence. Boast. Win at all costs. Defeat them morally as well as on the scoreboard. Make them loath the thought of going up against you next time.

Some will vilify and hate you. Some will call you arrogant. Some will declare you a cheat, call you a dirty player, and claim you are overrated, overhyped. This will be your fuel, not a reward, winning is your reward, but the naysayers light a fire under you. Proving them wrong is part of what makes victory so sweet.

There is no consolation prize, no celebration for mere participation. No. There is simply the drive to win next time. Hours of practice lie ahead. More than any other competitor is willing to do… because that is what winners do.

Nike “Am I a bad person?”commercial: https://youtu.be/pwLergHG81c

_____

Update: See my post, Good pushback , for follow up to this post.

In The Company of Crowds

Last night, me and about 16-to-18,000 of my closest friends gathered around giant TV to watch the Vancouver Canucks hockey game. Well, what actually happened was that my buddy and I went to a ‘Watch Party’ at our home arena, while the Canucks played the Oilers in Edmonton. I wasn’t sure what to expect? Going to a hockey arena and watching the game on a screen above the empty ice rink felt a bit surreal.

Even from the National Anthem before the game, it felt electric with a genuinely excited crowd. Then, like this was a pantomime, the crowd would boo and cheer pre-game when the camera focused on the Edmonton versus Vancouver players. This continued throughout the game, almost every time there was a stop in play.

It was a lot of fun cheering along with so many people but I couldn’t shake the oddity of so many fans coming to a massive arena to watch an away game on a giant screen; Everyone shouting and cheering as if they were actually at the game… Buying popcorn, and beer, and game day food; and all decked out in Vancouver fan wear, mostly in the away game jerseys.

I spent a good part of the night fully immersed in the game. And yet, I also had these meta-moments where I’d think about the fact that my shared experience with all these people was more like watching the game at home with friends than it was actually going to the game. One minute I’m feeling this whole experience is odd, and the next I’m fully caught up in the fervour and excitement of the game and the crowd. Participating in the wave was fun the first 3 rounds, watching the crowd go up and down in unison, then by the 7th time I’m wondering why this is still happening with no audience besides the audience?

The answer is, it’s all about the power of crowds. The power of being near others with common energy and spirit. The power of sharing a moment, an excited experience with others who have the same intentions. Since before the colosseum and gladiators, crowds have gathered to cheer for talented heroes of one sort or the other. Warriors and athletes performing at their peak, with only one of two outcomes: victory or defeat.

And it is so much more fun, in the company of crowds.

(Canucks won 4-3)

On Being Invisible

At our school, when we run a special event the students are in charge of the sound system. My line to them is that their job is to: ‘Be invisible’. The best job they can do is not to be noticed. We notice the sound crew when we hear microphone feedback, or static, or music starts too early, too late, or too loudly. Or someone speaks but the mic is off or too quiet. If none of these hiccups happen, the sound team are not ever in the limelight… and they have done an excellent job.

At a dinner meeting last night a colleague reminded me of a different kind of invisible, and that’s being invisible until it’s important to be seen. The metaphor he used was a referee. A referee should be invisible or not a factor in the game, doing his or her job, making the right calls, and not disrupting the flow of the game. However, there are also times when refs need to be the center of attention. They need to stop the game and make the big call. At this point they are crucial, and the wrong call can be devastating for a team.

They can spend most of the game being somewhat invisible, and going relatively unnoticed, and then suddenly they are front and center, making a key call that could pivot the outcome of the game significantly. A lot of jobs are more like the referee than the sound tech, as long as the person in the job is focussed on wanting to be invisible.

A good teacher or school counsellor can invisibly be doing a fantastic job, handling behavioural or social issues that never reach the office to be dealt with by a principal. These staff members may not get a lot of attention but they are quietly doing an excellent job… and when they ask for help or escalate a situation, the leader knows to step in and support them. Rather than explain the opposite, just know that sometimes situations demand more attention regardless of how good a teacher or school counsellor is, and other times the attention is required because the ‘referee’ is making less than ideal calls.

The point being, it’s ideal in many positions to be invisible, to take care of issues in the background, unseen. But there are also times to make the tough calls and to be in front of the issues and addressing them head on. The magic is in staying invisible most of the time and knowing when to reveal yourself.

The Playmaker

I watched a high school basketball game tonight. It was a blowout, ending with a score around 51-98. One kid on the winning team was a real highlight reel, with dunks, blocks, steals, 3-pointers, and despite being the biggest guy on the court, he’d bring the ball up the court sometimes, and even play the point guard position.

But of all the things he did, the highlight for me was when he’d penetrate the defence then find the open man and dish it to him for the easy basket. It wasn’t the dunks and blocks, it was being the playmaker and making sweet passes.

Teams need the clutch player that you can count on to score points, but when that clutch player is also a playmaker who makes his team play well, and who isn’t selfish, that’s a really great player. Then he’d be on the bench and he’d cheer like he’s the number one fan of the team.

In life, that’s the player to be.

This is just Canadian high school basketball, and while this kid will probably play university basketball, he’s probably not NBA material… but I’ll tell you one thing, whatever he does in life, I’d want him on my team.

Who I used to be

One of the funniest ‘athletes getting older’ stories I know is one of a former national water polo player who was somewhere around 60 years old and playing in a game against an enthusiastic teenager. The old guy swam into the hole (centre position) and the you scrappy kid was all over him. The ball came into the hole and the overactive kid fouls the old guy… a normal thing in the game of water polo, but the kid was a bit aggressive. After the foul the old guy looks back at the kid and says, “Hey, don’t you know who I used to be?”

It’s fair to say that I used to be an athlete. I played water polo at a high enough level, and trained hard enough to say so. And while I’m pretty fit now, and probably in better shape than 70-80% of people my age, I am not an athlete. I don’t say that disparagingly, but I don’t play any sports, and I’m very much past my prime. Where this comes into play is in my inability to really push myself.

I see it specifically in training certain muscles. I struggle to go past 80% effort. That’s the challenge point for me. If I really like an exercise, I remember how to push hard, but if I don’t like it, I struggle. I’ve lost that ‘athlete’s edge’ where I can push through the discomfort and really give my maximum effort at will.

That’s why I say I used to be an athlete. It’s not about the fitness, it’s not about feeling positive about how well I take care of myself (I do). It’s about the lack of ability to really push myself to a point past the threshold of discomfort that athletes can do every workout.

Maybe I’m just out of practice, and I need to have a sport as a reason to train? Maybe it’s that I’m more externally motivated and I need a team relying on me? Perhaps if I joined a gym and was surrounded by people I’d push myself more than I can training at home alone.

In any case, I know who I am now and who I used to be, and I’m good with that. I might have been an athlete, but now I’m a guy who wants to still be fit and healthy in 25 years. I don’t want to run a marathon, and I’m too crappy a swimmer and not willing to do the work to get back in the pool and play water polo again… but I am going to push where I can, be smart about how much weight I move around so I don’t hurt myself… and every now and then push to my max and remember who I used to be.