Tag Archives: habits

A bad day of fishing…

The saying goes, “A bad day of fishing is better than a good day at work.” It’s a good metaphor for a lot more than hobbies and employment.

“I don’t feel like working out.”

“I don’t really want to practice my musical instrument.”

“I don’t have anything to write about today.”

“It’s just a practice, I’ll skip and go to the game tomorrow.”

Do I want to do it right now? Hell no! Will I feel good if I get off my butt and do it? Absolutely!

Pick the battles that matter the most… not 7 at once, 2 or 3 max. Set an intention. Do it.

Why? Because a crappy ‘I just showed up’ workout is better than another skipped workout. And 15 minutes of practice or 250 words written are all examples of things that will make you feel far better after you’ve done them, rather than how you feel not doing them.

It’s a mental shift to move the metaphorical mindset from a bad day fishing to a bad day working out/practicing/writing feeling better than a good day not doing these things, because the payoff comes after the event. When you are fishing, even the last cast has potential. But when you are doing ‘the work’ (be it in the gym, on an instrument, or writing) it still feels like ‘the work’ and is not filled with the hope and promise of a big fish.

But doing the work, even on a bad day can surprise you. You might (totally unexpectedly) hit a personal best in the gym. You might play a chord combination that you’ve struggled with for weeks. You might pump out 1,000 words, or the best piece of writing you’ve done in a while. In other words you might just hook a big one. And realistically you might not, but still the act of doing anything is far more rewarding than doing nothing.

Skip another day and the only thing you’ll catch is the desire to skip again.

Here is some Monday motivation from Jocko Willink.

Actually, you’re doing great!

I came across this quote, but I’m struggling to find the original source.

Working out will make you feel weak, when it’s actually making you stronger.
Learning new things will make you feel dumb, when it’s actually making you smarter.
Investing in yourself will make you feel broke, when it’s actually making you rich.
Facing your fears will make you feel terrified, when it’s actually making you braver.
Never hold yourself back.
Strive to be better tomorrow than you were today.
Thank yourself later.

If you want to be hard on yourself, do so for not trying when it’s hard. Be tough on yourself when procrastination wins and you skip an attempt to improve. But no matter how small the gains may appear, no matter how minimal your attempt to be better seems successful, that is the journey you want to be on.

James Clear said,

Goals are for people who care about winning once.
Systems are for people who care about winning repeatedly.

You don’t set the right systems in place when you are looking for instant gratification or results. You show up… Every. Single. Day… And you take solace in knowing that what you do today will pay dividends for days, months, and years ahead. Understanding this helps to relieve the stress of not seeing long term positive results, by trusting in the seemingly insignificant improvements today will bring.

Today is fleeting, there are many tomorrows, many days that future you will appreciate the efforts you put in today. The original quote above ended with, Strive to be better tomorrow than you were today. Thank yourself later.” I think that I would add, ‘Also remember to thank yourself today… you’re doing great!’

Habits and motivation

I’ve got my weight vest on. However, I don’t want to get on the treadmill, which is why I’m wearing the vest. I want to crawl under my blankets and not think about having to shovel the driveway later.

But yesterday was a rest day and I refuse to be someone who misses two days in a row. My habit of regular exercise is part of my identity. Am I motivated right now? Hell no! Am I going to work out immediately after writing this? Absolutely!

Make your habits about who you are and not what you do… and you don’t need motivation… you just get it done.

The push

It’s fascinating how much of weight training is mental. I’m simultaneously an athlete who can push my body to a level that surprises me, and the loafer who can’t eke out one more rep despite still having gas left in my gas tank. One minute I’m forcing myself to get one more weighted pull-up done, straining with everything I’ve got to get my head above the bar. A few minutes later I’m quitting on weighted step-ups, because mentally, rather than physically, I’m done.

What I’ve mastered is showing up. What I’m working on now is maximizing my gains. That doesn’t mean being stupid, lifting too heavy, and hurting myself. What it does mean is making my sets count. Making my reps count. Making my workouts efficient and effective.

How does this look when I’ve mentally quit on a set too soon? Maybe it means a 4th set. Maybe it means a lighter weight and more reps. Maybe it means giving myself permission to let that one set go and come back stronger the next set… or if need be the next workout. Awareness is the first step. The next step is being intentional about what I do next.

If I’m going to see the gains I plan to have in the next year, I’ve got to push a little harder than I have been. Pushing in a smart way is going to get me to my goals… injury free.

Healthy Living Goals Reflection for 2024

It started January 1st, 2019. I was almost 30 pounds overweight and I decided that I’d had enough of working out, getting busy and lazy and not working out, and yo-yo-ing between these two states… while progressively getting further out of shape.

In my 1 year video reflection, back in late December 2019, I was able to share that I’d basically lost the 30 pounds and was back on track for staying healthy. Now, years later, I’ve put back on about 12 pounds, but a completely healthy 12 pounds. I’ve added almost an inch to my biceps, I have great definition on my (still skinny) legs, and my shoulders/traps are probably where I see my biggest gains.

Here are my key stats this year:

Workouts – defined as a minimum of 20 minutes cardio and some weights (unless it’s a Coquitlam Crunch day when I don’t usually go weights).

Meditation – At least 10 minutes, usually 15 or 20 minutes guided meditation on the Balance App.

Daily-Ink – Daily writing on this blog.

Writing/Creating – Intended to be for writing beyond my blog regularly but mostly just tracking conversations with my uncle.

Workouts: 326 days or 89%

Meditation: 313 days or 85%

Daily-Ink: 366 days or 100%

Writing/Creating: 53 days or 14.5%

Reflections:

Workouts: I’m actually setting a goal to work out less in 2025. I’ve made some good gains and think they can be better if I gave myself more rest. This is especially true for my legs. I think working out cardio 10-12+ days in a row is limiting my leg recovery time needed to see them grow a bit more. Lack of rest might be why my legs are a lot stronger but still skinny. For upper body, many of my workouts are just a single muscle focus, and so I usually get enough rest between hard sets for specific muscle groups.

Meditation: These could have been qualitatively better this year. It’s not an issue of volume but definitely one fit quality. In 2024 I found that writing was taking me a bit longer in the morning, and so a lot of times I ended up doing a walking meditation on the treadmill to make up the time. That said I’m not convinced that those meditations were necessarily moving me towards my meditation goals as much as dedicated time would.

Daily-Ink: I’ll keep my blog going another year. And while I’ve basically maintained daily writing for 5 and a half years, I still want to track it.

Writing/Creativity: The largest area for growth is in being creative. I’m going to do a couple things to improve this. First, I won’t be counting conversations with my uncle, even when we are recording them. What I will count is video editing of the videos he and I record, as well as writing not related to by blog. A goal related to this is less social media time… Reducing distractions and focusing on creativity. My writing/creativity goal will be a minimum of two days per week, 104 days a year, or basically doubling last year’s total while not counting the vast majority of days I would have tracked last year. I won’t meet my uncle less often, I just won’t be counting these Zoom visits as part of my creativity goal.

Ultimately I want to see two outcomes this year that will result from my tracking above:

  1. Gain 7-8 pounds of muscle. This is a big jump for me. In my 30’s and 40’s I had a hard time maintaining a weight of about 153 pounds. If I worked out consistently for several months I’d get my weight to 155 but struggled to put good weight on beyond that. When I stopped working out I’d drop a few pounds and sit closer to 150. By December 2018, at age 51, I’d (unintentionally and without awareness) let myself go and weighed just under 185 pounds, with all of that extra weight being unhealthy. After year one of my healthy living goals (reflection shared again here) I was back down to around 155. Now I fluctuate around 167-169 pounds and would like to bring that to 175 pounds. Basically, it took me about 5 years to gain 12 pounds of muscle and I want to add 8 more this year. Increased protein and more dedicated weight training will get me there if I maintain my positive habits and get a bit more rest between (harder/smarter) workouts.
  2. More creativity. I think 2 days a week of doing something creative is realistic and attainable. Reducing social media distractions will be key. I’m going to automate my blog going into social media, and add time limits to all socials for Monday to Friday as a starting point. I’ll see how that works and re-evaluate my success after a month.

Finally, one more goal unrelated to my tracking will be a reading goal. Watching that December 2018 reflection video again I was shocked that I listened to 26 books that year. I think this year’s count was 6, with 3 partial reads to finish, although I did listen to a lot more podcasts. I want to improve my book count. I think this will also help with my creativity.

One final reflection: Overall I’m pretty damn proud of my 2024 stats above. Yes I have some ambitious goals ahead of me, and I’m always pushing to improve… but that doesn’t take away from the fact that I’ve been on a 6 year journey from an overweight and unhealthy 51 year old to a 57 year old who hasn’t been this healthy and strong since I was an athlete in my 20’s.

My ultimate goal is a great healthspan to go with my lifespan. I want to be able to do things in 20 years that most 77 year olds can’t imagine doing. I want to be hiking, traveling, and living a vibrant, healthy life well into my senior years. I think I’m on the right path.

Motivation versus Routines

It’s definitely the holidays for me. The time is 10:19pm and I’m just starting my writing. I haven’t meditated yet, (and missed the last couple days), and haven’t worked out yet either. Why? I’m off of my routines and my morning habits are not getting done to start my day.

Although it was not a busy day, I did get some important errands done, and don’t feel like I wasted the day… but here I am feeling very little motivation to get a workout in. I will, but it feels like effort.

That’s the difference between good habits and routines versus motivation. When I have my routines set, writing just gets done. Workouts get done. Meditation gets done. Zero motivation needed.

But let my routines slip and suddenly everything gets harder to get started. And getting started is the hardest part. Some days I feel like crap and just go through the motions simply because that’s part of my routine. Some of those days continue to feel hard, but sometime the act of getting started is all I need to turn the day, or at least my mood, around.

Routines help me get started. No motivation required. And now it’s time to finish this and get started on my workout. I think I’ll do a walking meditation on my treadmill and that’s one less thing to have to motivate myself to do. The best thing I’ve ever done for my health and wellbeing has been the strict routines I’ve created to get my healthy living goals done. I just need to rethink how I maintain these routines over my holidays.

Routines vs rut-tines

Ok, let me start by acknowledging that rut-tine is not a word. It’s a play on the word ‘rut’.

Rut: An uninspired routine or pattern of behavior that one continues unthinkingly or because change is difficult.

Routines are so important. When you routinize a habit the habit becomes easy. There is no need for motivation when your habit has become routine. Case-in-point: I will meditate and exercise as soon as I finish writing this. No effort required, this is my routine and that’s what I do next. Minimal effort required to start the process.

But just like it takes no effort to maintain my healthy habits, routines can serve bad habits just as easily. For example, I generally don’t snack after dinner Sunday to Thursday night. No treats, no beverages, just dinner and then bed without any other food. I developed the habit of not eating after dinner precisely because when I do, it’s almost never a healthy snack. However, I have a weakness for chocolate covered almonds and almost every night for the past couple weeks I’ve taken a handful of these delicious treats after dinner. And this has led me to other more unhealthy snacks as well.

Essentially I fell into a rut-tine, an unintentional routine that is less than ideal. I don’t even realize I’m doing it until I’m sitting on the couch with a handful of chocolate almonds or a bowl of chips. But this is a minor thing, I’ll run out of chocolate almonds and I’ll soon return to my disciplined routine of not snacking 5 days a week.

However this got me thinking… What routines and habits of mind do I have that are more rut-tine than routine? How many little mental scripts do I have that I would be better off not having? How have I routinized bad habits that are either mentally or physically unhealthy or unhelpful?

Because it’s easy to stay in a rut once that rut is part of what we do daily. And we need to recognize that we are in a rut or the rut-tine just takes over and we say rutted. We need to identify the difference between a good routine and a rut-tine, and then change the latter into the former.

A rest day

One of the best parts of getting older is that unlike when I was half my age, I actually listen to my body. Four days ago I did my Norwegian Protocol cardio workout and really pushed hard. I also did a bicep workout. Three days ago I did a hard incline walk with a 34lb weighted vest. Then I did pull-ups and step ups with the vest still on.

Two days ago I did a really challenging leg workout out then had some knee aches through the day. Yesterday I did a light 20 minute stationary bike ride to get the blood flow to my legs and hopefully reduce the lactic acid buildup from the leg workout. Then I did a hard chest workout.

Today I know I need a break. Sure I spread out my workouts and don’t overdo any one area, except maybe going a bit too hard on legs. Sure I have areas like my back or abs that I could focus on today while giving my other muscles a rest. But I can tell I need a rest day… my body is telling me so.

Younger me would have felt guilty taking the day off. Younger me would have pushed through, not realizing that my very healthy knees almost never bother me and maybe a rest day is in order. Younger me would probably have worked out today and dealt with any pain as a result, as if it’s nothing to worry about, until it was too painful to continue.

But not today. Today I rest. It’s a wonderful rest day! And I’ll be back at it tomorrow.

Social media algorithm

Sometimes I get sucked right into the death scroll. I am pulled into the vortex of swiping to the next video and being fully engaged entertained by what’s on my phone screen. I laugh out loud, I share with friends and family, I am amazed, I am enlightened. But mostly I’m entertained and distracted.

There is a love/hate relationship to this scrolling. I find it a healthy escape, better than watching a half hour TV show that has less than 22 minutes of actual show, and an often painful laugh track. Why watch something produced for the masses instead of a stream of vignettes that an algorithm caters to me? I also despise the time suck sometimes, wishing I got my butt off the couch because the 30 minutes I thought I was going to spend ends up being longer. Or worse yet, a quick check of the phone leads me into a direction I wasn’t planning on going.

I think my use is mostly healthy, but if I’m honest there are times when it’s really not. My week days are pretty manageable, with my scrolling primarily happening after dinner, but weekends tend to be a different story. Sometimes I can spend way too long staring at my phone. The algorithm figures me out and feeds me a continuous flow of entertaining distraction.

I don’t need to go on a social media diet, it’s not a problem, but it is something I need to pay attention to. Am I using the algorithm to provide a bit of entertainment, or is it merely a time-sucking distraction? Am I in control or am I letting the algorithm control me?

Avoidance is easy

I’m back in the loop of struggling to write. It makes me truly appreciate the challenges of authors who do this for a living. Sometimes the words flow and it’s like a poetic dance between thought and expression. Words, and even full ideas almost magically appear on the page, leaving me uncertain of where they came from.

Other times I stare at the blank page, or worse, I avoid the blank page. I seek distraction and call it inspiration. I am looking in all the wrong places. I am literally uninspired.

When I feel like this avoidance is easy. The ‘simple’ work of developing an idea into a piece of writing is not simple, it’s hard. Really hard. Avoiding the effort of thought when the thoughts are not coming becomes a losing game. Maybe I’ll look here for ideas, there for motivation, or over here for… yet another distraction even though I don’t want to call it that. And that’s game over. Time not so well wasted.

Avoiding the blank page is easy, but it’s not productive. How many things do we do that are the equivalent of this avoidance? For some it’s avoidance of a hard conversation, for others it’s a big task, for yet others it’s the minutiae that needs to get done but feels monotonous. Some people find solace that different ‘stuff’ gets done when they procrastinate, but does that really result in a positive experience?

How much time do we spend in a state of busyness rather than dealing with business? Avoiding the real task by doing other things, or worse yet doing something that’s merely a distraction. Some things get automated, habits get ritualized, and the work just gets done. But sometimes the struggle is real. The action avoidance becomes the easy task and the work doesn’t become the work, but actually just getting down to work. Because once you start the work gets done.