Writing is my artistic expression. My keyboard is my brush. Words are my medium. My blog is my canvas. And committing to writing daily makes me feel like an artist.
I was at a meeting yesterday morning where some critical feedback was shared by a group of students. I think the feedback was very useful, and there was a lot to gain from the information. I don’t know how it was received by others?
When you get feedback and it isn’t what you are looking for, what’s your first instinct?
Is it to rationalize why the feedback was not ideal? Was it a bad question? A misunderstanding? …An excuse of one kind or another?
Or do you analyze, reflect, and think critically about what the feedback really means?
Rationalization is really easy, but renders the information useless. Analysis can lead to uncomfortable realizations, but may lead to meaningful learning and, more importantly, changes in behaviours or systems.
I think rationalization is an emotional response, it’s a defence mechanism. It’s a way to comfort your ego… but it’s not a way to learn and grow. Honest analysis is not about finger-waving and blame, nor about making excuses. Rather it’s about informing practice and getting better. And in the end, getting better feedback in the future.
This is one of the most enjoyable graduation addresses that I’ve ever heard. Rick Rigsby’s “Lessons from a third grade dropout” shares some wonderful insights with a delivery that leaves you wanting more.
Two ‘truth bombs’ that he delivers are the following quotes:
“Ego is the anesthesia that deadens the pain of stupidity.”
And,
“Pride is the burden of a foolish person.”
I see it more and more, people’s egos and their pride get in the way of many things ranging from being a lifelong learner, to being a decent human being. Rick got to experience the wisdom of a 3rd grade dropout who was one of the smartest people he knew. That’s a gift, an opportunity for insight.
We often see social media posts where someone mistreats or underestimates a person with lower social stature, and then learns the errors of their ways when this person is smarter or more helpful than expected… or that ‘lowly’ person outwits the more affluent or pompous person.
This ‘underdog as hero’ message is prevalent in movies too.
The other message in these stories is ‘don’t be a jerk’.
Despite all these social media and movie ‘lessons’ we see shared, there seems to be no shortage of egotistical and pride filled people in the world. In fact many people think you need this to be great. Where would some of the most noted (and notorious) athletes, movie stars, and politicians be without there inflated egos? You don’t get attention when you are selfless. Maybe you can, and maybe if more people did, this would trend more, and the big egos would get less attention. Maybe.
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But there’s a lot more to this speech than just those two quotes. There are also valuable lessons on failure.
“Wisdom will come to you from the unlikeliest of sources. A lot of times from failure. When you hit rock-bottom, remember this: while you’re struggling, rock-bottom can also be a great foundation on which to build, and on which to grow.
I’m not worried that you’ll be successful, I’m worried that you won’t fail from time to time. The person that gets up off the canvas and keeps growing, that’s the person that will continue to grow their influence.”
Truth.
Watch the video and enjoy this inspirational speech.
I plan to write a series of 7 Virtues over this coming week, in addition to my regular daily posts, then auto post them the following week while I take a social media break. I will be deleting my Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram Apps off of my phone and only using my phone or a laptop with notifications turned off for my sabbatical. On that note, if you regularly read this blog from my Facebook Story or Facebook Timeline, please ‘Like’ this FB page, because during my social media break I won’t be manually adding the posts to my Story or Timeline. You can also get Daily-Ink by email.
Here are 7 Virtues that I am thinking of writing about: (The order might differ.)
Love (including Chastity and Loyalty)
Discipline (including Patience, not just Diligence or Temperance)
Pride in small doses can give a sense of accomplishment, value, and even self-respect. ‘Wow, look what I am capable of.’ This is not yet the sin of pride. The sin of pride comes with arrogance, self-righteousness, bragging, superiority, and disdain.
The sin of pride is ugly. It struts in front of the accomplishment, and steps into the limelight in full display. It steals attention from others that supported the accomplishment, and undermines teamwork.
Arrogance and superiority are allies of pride. Together, they blind one to the possibility that humbleness is endearing, that compliments can complement success, and satisfaction is better felt when feeling appreciative rather than smug.
Who got you where you are today? Whose support would you struggle without? Who inspired you? Who paved the way for you? Who did the work you could not have done on your own? Who deserves to share in the accomplishment? At least one of these questions should give you an answer that helps you see the selfishness of being smug.
Enjoy your accomplishments, but let them fuel you and those around you, rather than letting them fuel your pride.
