Tag Archives: Life Lessons

No Reason to Wait

Leave a reply

When I was a kid, I used to collect the caps that you fired in a cap gun. They came in a disk with 8 shots each. When we went to the store, I’d ask for another pack of them, and they were cheap so my mom often bought them for me. The thing is, I never shot them. I was saving them just for the right time.

My grandparents lived across the street from us and I kept the caps and my cap gun at their house. They had a room with an ensuite bathroom that belonged to my great grandfather, and after he passed away, I was the only person who went into those rooms. I kept the caps and gun under the ensuite bathroom sink.

The day before we moved from Barbados to Canada I suddenly remembered that the caps were there and I gathered up my gun and my packets and packets of caps. I took them to my dad and asked him to pack them. “David, we shipped our boxes already, and we can’t take all of those on the plane,” my dad told me. So there I was, with hundreds of caps and a couple hour window to use them.

I shot every one of them off. Eight quick shots in succession, reload, repeat. I can still remember the smell of the fired caps as I recall this years later. I also remember being a bit sad that I had not spread out the use of the caps, that I lost out on many enjoyable opportunities because I was saving them up for the ‘right’ occasion. There was always going to be a better time to use them, until there was almost no time at all.

How often do we do something similar? We are waiting for the right moment. We are metaphorically hoarding an idea, or waiting to find out more before we act, or wanting the conditions to be perfect before we move forward?

James Clear said, “Use the best idea you have right now. Claiming you need to ‘learn more’ or ‘get your ducks in a row’ is just a crutch that prevents you from starting. Education is a lifelong pursuit. You will always need to learn more. It’s not a reason to wait.”

Shoot off a few caps, don’t wait.

Cross pollination

Leave a reply

Do you know what’s really hard to do? First, choose an area of your life where you really have your ‘stuff’ together. Then take those same skills, habits, and discipline and apply it to another part of your life. It should be easy, or at least easier than it is. We should be able to recognize what makes us extremely effective in one aspect of our lives and simply apply the same strategies elsewhere.

What prevents this? Is it motivation? Is it the fear of starting? Is it that we recognize the effort is more than we are willing to put out?

Whatever the reason, it’s sometimes important to remember that it is easier to act your way into a new way of thinking than it is to think your way into a new way of acting. Start with the action. Do the things you already do elsewhere in a new area of your life. Start with small actions, but the action itself is the start. Not the thinking, not the planning, not the talking about it… the doing.

Apply action, and the good work and skills you’ve developed will indeed cross over.

Going beyond ‘Reconnect, Reminisce, and Repeat’.

Leave a reply

I got away with a buddy to go fishing for a couple hours on Wednesday. It was part of a bigger day together, and we didn’t fish for long, or catch anything. But we connected and had an adventurous day. Good food, good company, and good scouting for a future fishing trip.

It’s one of the things he and I talk about, which is the idea of connecting for experiences. When you don’t see a good friend regularly, it might be easy to ‘pick back up where you left off’ and feel connected. But it can also feel like that’s all you do… Reconnect, reminisce, and repeat.

We didn’t plan a whole day of fishing, we took advantage of the resources and time available to us and made the most of it with a new experience. We didn’t just talk about the things we’ve done or hope to do, we had an excursion. Too often we think planing and organizing needs to be a drawn out part of connecting, with an event planned on some distant future date.

Last night another buddy texted to see what I was up to and just over an hour later I was sitting on his balcony. Then we walked to a delicious dinner. This was so refreshing compared to, “What are you doing next week Friday?”

Plans don’t need to be big, and novelty and newness make for great experiences. Also, last minute plans can be so much more fun than the bigger, much more planned events can be. Novelty keeps the experiences new enough that they become the things we talk about years from now.

Planning an adventure

Leave a reply

A friend was talking about an upcoming trip and the enthusiasm and excitement he shared was contagious. It got me thinking about how differently I think of trip planning. For him it is literally part of the adventure. For me, it often feels like work.

This was insightful. I’ve got it all backwards. For me the excitement comes when I arrive at the destination. For him the adventure begins long before that. I’m missing out, a simple shift in perspective would give me far more joy. The journey begins with planning.

Remembering the Push

Leave a reply

I’m 57. I’m never going to compete athletically at the level I did half a lifetime ago. I know this. I understand this. I’m good in terms of how I think about this.

And so what I look for now are moments where I connect with that former athlete, the drive, the push, that I once had in sports. The ability to have my body quit before my mind does. That’s the push.

We are capable of so much more than our minds usually allow. We exert ourselves with mental limits conservatively below what our bodies can achieve. So when we have those moments where we surrender those limits and work our bodies to limits that are our real limits… we remember the push of who we once were… and we become that again.

A little perspective

Leave a reply

Sometimes things don’t go as planned. You think everything is trucking along and life surprises you. Humbles you.

It’s a good reminder to appreciate what you have. We complain about the simplest of things. We don’t take the time to say, ‘thank you’. We focus on the negative instead of all the positives.

Meanwhile there is so much to appreciate and value. And this is what we should focus on.

Iterate, iterate, iterate

Leave a reply

We’ve all heard the phrase, “If at first you don’t succeed… try, try again.”

That’s the right idea but the wrong language. It should be, “If at first you don’t succeed… iterate, iterate again.”

Because we all know another saying too, “Do you know what the definition of insanity is? Doing the same thing again and again, and expecting a different result.”

We don’t need to try again, we need to iterate, again and again… Tweak, adapt, adjust, fine-tune, modify, tailor, refine, reshape, alter, and/or calibrate. And to do all this we need to embrace failure as learning.

Trying the same thing again just won’t do.

It’s your job

Leave a reply

I heard a great quote today, ‘Nobody will ever love you exactly the way you want… Because that’s your job.’

It reminds me of an insightful question, “Would you hang out with a person who speaks to you the way you speak to yourself?’

We can be our own worst critics, and yet it costs us nothing to appreciate ourselves rather than put ourselves down. That doesn’t mean that we don’t strive to be better. It’s not about accepting mediocrity. It is however an opportunity for us to find value and appreciation in who we are and what we accomplish.

It starts with acceptance, and ultimately self-love. There are enough critics in the world, it doesn’t make sense that the one you hear the most is yourself. It’s ultimately your job to love you first. And when you’ve humbly, yet sincerely achieved that, the love of others is sure to follow.

Guiding students forward

Leave a reply

Watch this leadership lesson I just found on Instagram:

I can’t help but think about how important this is not just in business/leadership roles, but also in teaching. The best teachers guide students. Teachers are the compass: “A compass doesn’t point the way, it points north and guides the student on their own journey.”

We lose sight of learning when we focus on teaching courses and not students. We lose our bearings when the curriculum is more important than the learner. We are completely lost when we teach to the test.

Watch the video again, and think of the times you led a challenging student rather than faced off with them. Like the time you put the ‘trouble-maker’ in charge because you had to leave the room for a couple minutes… knowing he would keep things in line for you but would cause problems if a peer was left in charge of him. Or the time you metaphorically threw a lesson out the window because students felt lost and you were not getting the learning across. Or when you sat with a kid to do 5 homework questions, letting them know that if they did that with you, they wouldn’t have to do any of the remaining homework.

Are you the guiding compass or the bossy captain? Are you facilitating learning or trying to push learning down their throats? Are you building resistance and conflict or resilience and trust?

The stretch

Leave a reply

A few days ago I did something I’ve never been able to do. I stood up, bent over at the waist, and was able to not just touch my toes, but touch the floor. I just stopped writing this to try again just now and I wasn’t even close. The difference is that I did a good 10 minute stretch before the time I actually achieved this.

I’ll try again today after I’m warmed up. I have been stretching my hamstrings more than usual for quite a few months to get to this point. But I am probably years away from being able to touch my toes ‘cold’, without any warm up. Yet I am still appreciative of the gains I have made.

In every aspect of life, it’s good to stretch yourself!