Tag Archives: learning

That unlearning thing ain’t easy

“The illiterate of the 21st century will not be those who cannot read and write, but those who cannot learn, unlearn, and relearn.” ~ Alvin Toffler

I love this quote, it speaks to the need to embrace change, and to understand that best practice is still just practice. However as easy as it is to understand this idea, it’s much harder to acclimate to. Especially the unlearning part.

I’ve been back into archery since the winter break, got a personal best score of 280 recently, and have been able to duplicate that score a second time. (Scoring is 10 rounds of 3 arrows, with a max score of 10 points per arrow, totalling 300 for a perfect score.) However, I was using a very bad technique with my thumb squeezing the trigger rather than using backward tension on my hand and arm to trigger the release. Since trying to do this properly, I’ve been struggling more and scoring between 267 and 274.

Today I scored a 267, but I was also able to score an X-X-10 three times while practicing. I had been unable to score a perfect 30 in a round for weeks. (An ‘X’ is 10 points but also signifies that I was able to get the arrow in or on the line of the center ‘X’ ring that is the size of a penny, shooting from 18m or 20 yards away.)

While trying to work on my release these past couple weeks, my scores have been lower, and my ability to hit the ‘X’ has been infrequent. But I know that if I continue to punch the trigger with my thumb, I will not shoot nearly as high of a personal best score in the future. My trigger pulling could show some short term gains, but those gains will limit me later on. The problem is, as I unlearn doing this, my scores have gone down.

Unlearning something is hard. Right now there are many things I need to focus on, and when I’m trying to change my muscle memory, my other muscles do funny things. For instance, my bow hand has been gripping the bow tighter, rather than being relaxed, while I think about my back-tension release. And when I relax my hand after drawing, I find it hard to not relax my arm, causing me to have less tension holding my bow ‘hard against the wall’, meaning keeping pressure on the bow’s cams at the back of a full draw.

Without talking about archery technique specifically: while I focus on unlearning a bad habit, my body, accustomed to doing things wrong, doesn’t know how to put all the good moves together. Unlearning one technique means not just learning something new, but also relearning other things as they related to the old vs new learning.

This dip in my scores is part of the unlearning process, and it’s not easy to go through. When we practice new skills, we want to see a quick payoff. But sometimes we need to recognize that unlearning isn’t nearly as easy as learning, and the payoff comes from the practice itself, and not immediate progress. I can focus on my technique, and unlearning a bad habit, or I can worry about my score right now… what I can’t do is both at the same time.

Having hard conversations

Last night I joined a conversation on Clubhouse that was really challenging.

Because I am writing this before 6am, and don’t plan on writing for a couple hours, I’m going to leave the topic out of my thoughts below.

The conversation was hot and a participant (who was in my opinion immature) created a bit of a mess. I wasn’t planning on speaking but thought I could give some insight to the challenging topic this young man brought up. I said what I wanted to, then I made a tangent point to another argument. This tangent, to be blunt, was uninformed (read as ‘ignorant’ if you like), and it was further misunderstood in a way to undermine everything I said before this error. My fault. My communication was poor.

Then a second crap-storm broke out. I sat silently while other people argued for and against a point I never intended to make. About 15 minutes later the moderator created a space, invited me, back into the conversation.

I was careful to apologize, tried to explain what I was really trying to say. Then again acknowledged that what I said was wrong. I didn’t want my explanation of intent to be perceived as an excuse, so I was happy to end with a second apology.

But others still wanted to talk about the point that was contentious, even though there was a window of opportunity to move on, and the discussion became a convoluted argument. More people misspoke and the conversation was filled with people triggered by the previous speaker. Then some of them got upset with the moderators who where trying their best to keep the conversation polite and respectful.

Hard conversations are hard to have… or they wouldn’t be hard! But we need to learn to have them. We need to understand that learning conversations might involve not just disagreement, but hurt. We need to be willing to set aside egos, and not take things personally, when there isn’t intent to hurt. We need to make conversation spaces places where we can misspeak, where we can apologize, where we can disagree, even in places where topics make us feel uncomfortable.

We need conversations to be safe, and understand that topics won’t always feel safe. This is tricky. This is something some people won’t agree with. But if the conversation can’t go to uncomfortable places, to places that feel uncomfortable, then the learning is hindered. The ability to make mistakes and learn from them disappears. The conversation becomes a ‘safe space‘ but it is no longer a rich learning space. Hurt is no longer something that can be healed, instead it is interpreted as hate. Perspectives become polarized, rather than recognizing how ideas are on a spectrum:

“We want to live, thrive, and love in a pluralistic society. We just need to recognize that in such a society we must be tolerant and accepting of opposing views, unaccepting of hateful and hurtful acts, and smart enough to understand the difference.”

Hurtful words are not always hurtful or hateful acts. Opposing views are not always personal attacks. And opposing views are not ever changed by attacking the person who holds those views. If we let the words, said in error, said in misunderstanding, and even said in ignorance, hurt us, we can not do the work to reach, or help others learn. We do not leave the room for insight or apology. We do not create any space for an opposing view to change.

Instead, we create a space where we can only feel wronged, where there are feelings of injury, and words are said in anger. Conversation gets lost, words get weaponized, and opportunities for learning diminish. If we can’t have conversations about difficult topics, because they don’t feel safe, then what is the alternative? Ignorance? Violence?

Words can hurt. If we hold on to the hurt, if we only see hate, words don’t ever get to heal. While we prevent the potential for hurt by avoiding challenging and charged conversations, we also never get to a place where minds can change… where conversations are hard, but where authentic learning can happen… where dialogue can bring people together, rather than keep people with opposing and different views apart.

Thinking time and space

The last few weeks have been busy. That is a statement I could probably say at any given point in the school year, but specifically I’ve been task busy recently. What I mean is that my day disappears with me doing what I need to do and not at all what I want to do. I haven’t had much thinking time.

So at the end of last week I started a drawing on my office whiteboard. It a hero’s journey metaphor for our school. I’m not ready to share the drawing yet, ideas are still being put together. But I can share a couple parts I’ve already written about:

Teacher as Compass

And,

Learning and Failure

I’ve probably only spent about an hour and a half over 4 days on this, not too much time… But this time has allowed me to think… It has given my brain permission to go beyond the tasks at hand… It has excited me about the journey ahead.

It’s easy to get caught in the hamster wheel, racing to nowhere, but getting there quickly. It takes intentional effort to step off the wheel and to pause long enough to think, to be creative. My whiteboard has become that space.

Yesterday after lunch, I was working on a section of the board where my secretary could see me making notes and she said, “You are having so much fun on that board.” For about 15-20 minutes I was! I’ve created some thinking time and space in my day. It’s not only time well spent, it’s time that charges my batteries and help me see value in all the other things I must do. It reminds my of why everything else matters, because our personal journey matters… if we make time for it.

Still on a fast growth path

I’m on cloud 9 after shooting a 280 in archery today! I thought it would be a long time to get here. In fact, six days ago I hit my personal best of 270 and this is what I shared here on my blog,

So now I have set a new goal of 275, with no score of 7 or lower on any arrow. Next after that will be a 280 with no score of 8 or lower.

I did have five 8’s, so I didn’t completely jump to my second goal, but I leapt right over my first goal.

Here is today’s journal entry:

I don’t know how long it will take to repeat this, but I’m going to enjoy the moment and celebrate these victories while they are coming faster than expected. No new goals for now, just consistency. I still have to achieve this score without any 8’s. After that I know the improvements will slow, but for now, I’ll just keep this childish grin going… and celebrate a surprise success!

Wanting attention at any cost

I had a student in my gym class, a very long time ago, who was the biggest victim of bullying in the school. I was always having to look out for him, but not so much because kids would outright pick on him, but rather because he was a danger to himself. I know what this sounds like, it sounds like I’m blaming the victim… And this can be a very sensitive topic, but it is something that happens often.

This kid would call a much bigger kid stupid after the bigger kid messed up a play. He would pester someone who wasn’t involved in the play, away from the ball. He would kick a ball out of bounds for no reason. He would constantly put himself in compromising positions almost as if he was using himself as bait.

This kind of behaviour is really challenging to deal with. It seems that some kids want and need attention and are somehow internally rewarded by any attention – good or bad. This ‘attention at any price’ motivation is challenging to understand. Often when positive attention was given to this kid it was almost always followed by seeking negative attention… as if the positive attention wasn’t enough.

Give the kid a compliment, minutes later he’s egging on someone. He scores a goal, moments later he’s picking up the ball rather than kicking it, and stopping the game. He gets a point in capture the bean bag, and in the next play he keeps running after he is tagged. It’s like, ‘that attention was good, but it’s gone and I need more’.

I can only understand this behaviour as attention seeking, because I can’t understand it through another lens. I don’t see any other benefit to the behaviour. It only makes sense to me as attention seeking. But I don’t know why a kid sees this as positive? And it plays out in many ways, and not always with kids like this who help to make themselves targets of others.

Please know that there are many times that students are picked on unfairly, and bullying is an issue that is dealt with in schools all the time. Many students do not deserve the wrath they face. Bullies have often been victimized themselves in some way, and they too are often attention seeking, with a difference in that they seek attention through power. I’m not saying in any way that a victim of bullying deserves to be bullied.

What I am saying is that we don’t always know or understand how or why some people will choose to seek attention? And, this behaviour can often invite negative attention as much as positive attention. Maybe being hated feels better than being ignored. Maybe someone’s anger feels better than their disdain. Maybe feeling something is better than feeling nothing at all.

When I’m dealing with misbehaviour, I always try to understand the motivation behind the behaviour. Often that’s where the healing has to start. But when the motivation seems to be attention, it can be really hard to understand what is behind that need, and how the behaviour meets that need. I find negative attention-seeking perplexing, and don’t always get to the heart of the issue.

The hardest part of it is that the negative behaviour that draws the attention often brings desired consequences… For example, a kids draws an inappropriate picture on another student’s work. This is dealt with by a teacher and the teacher’s consequences are a form of negative attention that completes the attention-seeking loop. So, the consequence given enforces the attention-seeking behaviour, rather than teaches any kind of positive behaviour change.

I can’t say that I’m particularly good at finding the root cause of attention-seeing behaviour. It’s not always apparent or obvious. Students can be complex; their wants and needs can be hard to understand. When it comes to seeking negative attention, I don’t think students always know or understand their own motives, and even if they do, they struggle to articulate these motives in an uncomfortable conversation with adults. It can really be challenging to deal with students who seek negative attention or desire attention regardless of whether it is positive or negative.

Hitting my targets

In the summer of 2016 I took up archery. It was a goal of mine for many years, but it took going through 6 months of chronic fatigue to convince myself to actually follow through. Before getting a diagnosis and path back to being healthy I had many, “Is this the rest of my life?” depressing thoughts, on exhausted days of constant tiredness. Recovering from this, I realized that if I didn’t start archery then, I probably wouldn’t ever start.

Fast forward to 2018 when my job intensified and I dropped archery, but at the start of 2019, started myself on a health kick. Now, for 2021, part of my healthy living goals includes 100 days of archery, (that’s an average of 1.9 days/week over the year). And today I shot my 11th day in the first 24 days of the year, so I’m well on my way.

Also today, I shot my personal best of 270, a goal I first made 2 weeks ago.

A 300, or ten rounds of 3 arrows with a maximum score of 10 per arrow, would would be a perfect score. So now I have set a new goal of 275, with no score of 7 or lower on any arrow. Next after that will be a 280 with no score of 8 or lower. At that point I’m looking at only hitting the yellow circle of a Vegas target every time. (For scale, the yellow 9-ring is about 3 inches or less than 7¾cm diameter, and the tiny X-ring inside the 10 is about the size of a penny.)

The challenge now is that each goal is incrementally decreasing the range of error, while also being exponentially harder to do! Today was the first day that I scored 2 rounds in one day, and my first score was a lousy 250, with three 7’s and one complete miss (outside the blue 6-ring). I’m not consistent yet at 270 and while I might hit a lucky 275 soon, it could be weeks or months before I’m consistently hitting all shots inside the 8-ring.

As I get better, individual improvements will take longer and longer. Three things are helping me right now.

  1. Improvements are still coming quickly, so I’m seeing rewarding results.
  2. I have some good coaching from someone significantly better than me.
  3. I’m exceeding my expectations around how often I’m practicing.

So, being keenly aware that things will get harder; that it will be more and more challenging to hit my targets, I am going to take the time and celebrate when I hit my goals.

Today I shot a 270!

Level 5 Leader

One of the big takeaways from Jim Collins book Good to Great: Why Some Companies Make the Leap and Others Don’t is the idea of a Level 5 Leader. The biggest feature of this leader is that they strive to develop those around them, and they want nothing more than to have the company do better after they leave than when they led. This is a noble and truly desirable thing to want. It’s not always what we see though. Lee Iacocca left a vacuum of leadership behind him. Donald Trump wants to be known as the greatest, and today emphasized wishing Joe Biden ‘Luck’, because in his eyes only luck could explain any future success.

It’s sad to see leaders who care more about themselves and their image than the successful path they leave behind. These are not people you want to be led by, or even associate with. They poison the environment rather than nurture it.

Mentors that I’ve had have always looked to not just help me, but let me stand on their shoulders. They have desired to see my success. When this is authentic, it is inspiring. This is behaviour we want to see emulated in the world.

It’s interesting that when a leader’s intentions are not in servicing those they lead, it shows, even when they are doing or trying to do something good. I’m not talking about just making good versus bad decisions, every leader does that at some point… I’m talking about intentions and motives not being right. I’m talking about making selfish decisions, or choosing notoriety over shared success. These are not actions of a Level 5 Leader.

I don’t understand the draw of loud, bragging leaders, but many seem to find their way to the top. The challenge is that while they may make it to the top of a good company or organization, they are not the leaders that will make the company or organization great.

The Big Shebang

Part 1

I had a really funny exchange in the office with three Grade 10 students. They were talking to my secretaries when I came in and they told me how good their presentation was in their last class. The Grade 10’s are in scrum teams researching books like: Good to Great, Dare to Lead, Atomic Habits, and The Practice, and creating presentations that summarize the book and run students they are presenting to through an activity to learn a concept or two from the book.

One of the girls was sharing some strategies they used to keep students engaged, and another one said, “It was so good, we were awesome. I wish you were there to see it… Actually, no, I’m glad you weren’t because we were already nervous enough.” To this I responded, “You see me in your class all the time and I stay and watch presentations whenever I can. Have I ever been scary? Why would me watching make you nervous?”

She responded, “Well… because… you’re the Big Shebang!”

I laughed and told my secretaries that I needed a new name plate for my office.

Part 2

One of the other projects that Grade 10’s are working on is to make improvements at the school. Four of the groups have decided to do murals and part of the process created by the teacher is “Mr. Truss’ approval”. This has been great and has given me the opportunity to share some feedback. Often, I’m very aware that my suggestions can come off as instructions, and I have to be careful not to derail their plans or vision by making an off-the-cuff suggestion that they think they now need to meet to get approval. While on the other hand, some suggestions just make sense and should be done.

An example of the latter is a mural with 3 panels, and in the middle panel a small item (a blueprint) was coloured a different colour than everything else in the mural. I suggested they use one of the colours of the image the blueprint was about, visible on both the other panels. This simple change took attention away from this small item, and created continuity for the piece. That suggestion was given as, “Try changing the blueprint colour to one of the colours of the item it’s a blueprint of, and see if that ties the 3 drawings together.” And they came back agreeing that it did.

I was far less pushy with another suggestion about an identical grass silhouette at the base of each hill they are drawing, to suggest that these panels are of the same hill rather than 3 different ones. While I like this idea, I didn’t push it the same way, because it was a suggestion that they could take or leave. It would tie things together, but it’s not as compositionally important, compared to an out-of-place, uniquely coloured item pulling attention to it unnecessarily, like the blueprint.

What I’ve really enjoyed is that “Mr. Truss’ approval’ is a big thing. It’s an affirmation that their work meets a standard of expectation. What I’m keenly aware of is that as the approval giver, I can overshadow or derail the vision of the students if I’m not aware of how my feedback can be taken.

Part 3

Inquiry Hub is a very unique school. As principal I get to see students visit my office with ideas, suggestions, and permission requests all the time. While I’ve dealt with minor discipline issues, they tend to be so minor that they don’t even make it into my office. So, I don’t hold the presence of a scary principal. Furthermore, I’m invited into classes all the time to see presentations (I wish I had more time to actually go sometimes). Yet, there are still times when students get nervous that I’m watching. There is the Big Shebang effect. To me it’s humourous, but I need to remember that to some students, it’s a big deal.

Starting reference point

Shot some arrows again today. I’ve been shooting at very close range, and working on my release. Then I decided to go back to 18 meters and shoot a round: 10 ends of 3 arrows. The maximum score is 300. I haven’t shot a round in over a year and a half and my goal today was to get at least a 240. I shot a 252, on targets that go as low as a 6 ring, with only one of my 30 arrows not scoring.

(Some photo/scoring details: The cover photo with 3 bullseyes was taken at very close range, about 10m. The score card details: X is a bullseye and counts as 10. M is a miss. Scoring order is not by arrow order, but highest score first.)

My mentor/coach has advised me to make notes beyond my score and here they are:

I’ve started a photo album on my phone. I think that I want my notes to be pen on paper rather than digital, then I’ll take a photo of them and add them to my album after my score, or on the same page as my score. This may change over time.

What I’m most happy about, besides my initial goal of getting at least a score of 140 and getting a 152, is the 10,9,9 recovery after shooting a 8, 7, Miss. One of my goals with archery is to not let my previous shot affect my next shot. This is my favourite part about the sport… it’s unforgiving and doesn’t allow me to wallow and be upset, and still shoot well. I can’t stay ‘in my head’, and beat myself up, and shoot well.

So now I have a starting reference point for shooting a round at 18 meters. My next goal will be a 270, but I’m not putting a timeline on that target until I shoot and score a few more times. It would be arbitrary to set a timeline without knowing what my progression will be like. I could hit a lucky 270 in 2 weeks, or I could be stuck below 265 for the rest of the year. I have no idea where I’ll be or how hard this will be until I shoot and score a few more times.

It’s still early in the year, and enthusiasm is high, but I think I’ll hit my goal of 100 days of archery this year, and it will be exciting to see how much I can improve over this year.

Easier targets

Today I moved my archery target about 2/3rds closer. Of course my shooting was much more accurate, but that’s not the point. With the stress of hitting a bulls eye at 20 meters removed, and the target itself being so much larger, I could focus on my release much more. I’m still new enough at archery that I need to think a lot about what I’m doing, and the one aspect of my shot that my brain wants to focus on most is my aim. Doing so, I often forget about my release and squeeze the trigger rather than using the back tension of my arm. So, 15 minutes after moving the target closer, I found myself hitting the bulls eye, and also doing the things I want to do with my release.

How often do we move the targets closer for our students who struggle? How often do we give them the chance to succeed on smaller tasks, on their way to more challenging ones? Yes, we often do this in Math. But where else is this strategy useful? How else can we move the targets closer, help students find success, then make the task progressively more challenging?