I got this

I was not a swim coach. I coached water polo and I did a level one swim coaching course, and there I was coaching the season’s first swim practice at a high school with over 10 years of back-to-back championships. It was a small 25 yard pool with 5 lanes, including the diving board lane that didn’t have a diving block. 124 students showed up.

It was mayhem. I saw a sea of arms, flailing, splashing, and colliding, despite my instructions to ‘stay right’, and not to flip turn with so many people in each lane. This was crazy, what did I get myself into? I can’t do this!

Then I called for everyone’s attention to begin the practice. I decided to do a few 50’s (two lengths of the pool) so that I could see students do the different strokes. Great in theory, but I quickly discovered that with 25 kids per lane, students couldn’t do a full lap without bumping into the lineup. This was ridiculous. What have I gotten myself into?

I blew my whistle, 4 or 5 loud blasts, and kids stopped and looked up. It got quiet. “Everyone out of the pool and onto the deck in the deep end. Stay in your lane lineups.”

“Ok, here we go. I want you to swim one length, then get out and walk back to your lane. Go 5 seconds apart. You can dive or jump in, your choice. Any questions?”

Now, I had order. But watching these swimmers go by was still overwhelming. That stroke looks good, that one is awful. That student is pulling his hands out too early. This student is doing something wrong, but I don’t know what?

Then it happens. I see a beautiful stroke. Elegant. Fast. The student is passing the the boy in front of her at just past half a length, despite his 5-second lead. At my knowledge base, I have nothing to teach her. But maybe…

As she walks by me I ask her, “do you swim with a club?l

‘Yes.’

“Can you do me a favour?”

‘Yes, sure.’

“Please go over to the other side of the pool and help coach lane 1.”

And so it begins. I find the next good swimmer, ask if they swim club, and ask them to ‘take a lane’ and help.

The practice ends with 7 coaches, including me. I break up the schedule so that I never have to face everyone at once anymore. And I decide that I actually am a swim coach.

I got this.

The spaces in between

It had been a few years since Jerry and I met face to face. I arrived at his house, greeted him with a hug, then went in to say hello to his wife, Sandy.

I met Jerry on the first day of university over 32 years ago, and I was with him at the party where he met Sandy.

Then off Jerry and I went on a fishing trip. The years apart melted away and we had fantastic day together. It wasn’t two distant friends reconnecting, it was two great friends melting away the time in between our opportunities to meet face to face.

Jerry doesn’t ‘do’ social media, and so I don’t connect as often with him as I do with others that are geographically distant. So, it will likely be at least a couple years before we connect again. Some of the stories will be retold, others might be forgotten, but the time together will be treasured, no matter how long the space is in between our visits are.

What’s on your home screen?

I think it is interesting to see what people put on their phone’s home screen. It is a little peek into their personality. Where do they spend their digital time? What social media do they use? What do they do for entertainment?

I think I want to start a little informal research and ask people about their home screen preferences. What will I learn from that? Will it change what I keep on my home screen?

What do you keep on your home screen, and why are those things important enough to take up that space?

Dear Siri

You don’t get me (yet). I know you are trying, but you just aren’t smart enough. When I call my wife a dozen times on her cell, do you need to ask me on the 13th call if I want to call ‘home’ or ‘mobile’.

When I say words together many times over, don’t autocorrect to a similar phrase… know me, don’t make me the average of what most people want.

I wish you could tell me things about other apps, act as a concierge, and predict ways that you can be helpful without me asking.

I know it’s a lot, I know you’ll get better, I know you’ll eventually ‘get me’… I just want it soon.

Much appreciated.

Dave

What do you see?

When you say that you like nature, do you like viruses, cancer, and decay?

When you say that you enjoy the city, do you enjoy traffic, higher crime rates, and sewage systems?

When you say that you love someone, do you love their idiosyncrasies, failings, and character flaws?

When you say that you are interested in something or someone, what do you see? What do you choose to overlook?

When something or someone bugs you, how much does your disposition affect what you see?

Someone just took the last piece of a cake… are you pissed off that you didn’t get it, or genuinely happy for the friend that did get it? How much does a small decision like that affect your mood? Or your attitude towards your friend? Or your overall happiness in the next hour?

You have incredible power to decide what you see, and to create a universe in your mind based on these decisions.

What are you choosing to see, and what kind of life are you living thanks to these choices?

Photographs in my mind

We used to take our negatives to a film processor to have them developed. Then we waited. Long ago we waited for a week, and eventually that time was reduced to just an hour. We’d collect the envelopes of photographs and before we left the store we were going through our shots one-by-one.

This one isn’t focused. This one has a blurry arm from it moving during the shot. In this one her eyes are closed. In this one he looked away. And this one, yes this one goes in a frame.

I say this with a bit of nostalgia, for there was something I enjoyed about the process. About the not knowing how good a shot was until long after I took the shot. About the surprise of a shot being better or, sadly, worse than I thought.

Film also gave me something else that I miss. As a photographer using film, every click of the shutter costed money. This made me more selective about the shots I would take… and not take.

It is an odd thing that I have photographs burned into my memory, but they are photographs that I never took.

There is the lost kitten jumping after a minister’s tassels during a wedding. I was being paid as the photographer and didn’t want to ‘waste the shot’ since they paid me by the roll of film.

The shot I did not take of the salt flats of Utah that faded into the sky without a horizon line. A brilliant memory that probably would not have made a good photo anyway.

There was the shot I lined up at Pike Place in Seattle, of an older man sitting on the hood of a parked car enthralled in a book, while cops on the street behind him tended to a fender-bender. I can still see the image that I did not take, feeling like I was invading his privacy.

We seem so much more free to take photos now, always having a camera in our pocket, and not a concern of the cost of taking one more shot.

But of all the shots I didn’t take, the photographs that still linger in my memory. These come to me from an era when film was the only option and the cost of the next shot lingered in my mind.

Necessary evil

Life isn’t always great. Sometimes things don’t go as planned. Tragedies happen. Friendships fall apart. Misunderstandings cause discomfort. And sometimes you have to interact with people who just aren’t nice.

No one likes situations like these, but we don’t strengthen our character or our convictions when everything is going our way.

We don’t learn perseverance, perspective, fortitude or patience without encountering challenges. We don’t build resilience or resolve when the stars align and our universe is unfolding ‘as it should’.

When we face challenges, by nature they are not easy, they are not desirable.

Yet they are necessary if we want to learn and grow.

Commute Time = Reading Time

My commute is very short. I get to work in about 7 or 8 minutes, but it will often take me over 10 minutes to get into the building. It takes longer because I end up sitting in my car listening to an audio book, waiting to find a good place to pause.

If I need to pick up one of my daughters, the ride to them is ‘reading time’ for me, listening to my book, and when I pick them up, I let them choose the music we listen to.

When I get on my treadmill or go for a run, I’m listening to my book. Travel and commute time, as well as cardio time, have become ‘reading’ opportunities for me.

Last year at this time, I’d read about 2 books. I find my eyes fatigued at the end of a work day, and so I don’t end up actually reading (rather than listening to) books all that often. In fact, I’m only half-done the one paper book I started reading in March. Meanwhile, I’ve listened to 11 audio books and am on my 12th now since January.

Audible has been great, and I’ve really enjoyed books like The Art of Learning by Josh Waitzkin and Essentialism by Greg McKeown. These insightful books are especially wonderful because they are read by the authors.

Thanks to audio books, my commute time is actually enjoyable learning time. I find myself wishing I had a slightly longer commute to work… how do you use your commute time?

Holiday in a cup

I just read an article: Vacations won’t help your burnout, which states: “…‪many of us stress out at work as we prepare to take a vacation, only to face a pile of things to do when we return. What’s better? Carving out small slices of relaxation every day.‬”

This reminds me of a conversation I had with a customer, when I worked as a manager.

I was working at a tiny Starbucks on Denman, not far from Davie Street, across from ‘The beaches”, in downtown Vancouver. Two doors down was a shoe repair shop. The cobbler worked 6 days a week, and he came in for a triple-tall latte, 2 times a day.

One day we were chatting about vacations and I said something like, “I’m not trying to lose you as a customer, but do you realize that if you didn’t have your 2 coffees a day, you could have a pretty amazing holiday with your wife and kids each year, for the cost of those coffees?”

He took a sip, held up his personal Starbucks logo mug he always used, and said pointing to the cup, “Dave, this is a holiday in a cup, and I get it twice a day!”

How do you, or can you, create your own daily ‘holiday in a cup’?

Expand Your Horizons

We were cleaning out our garage on Sunday and my wife was sorting things for a garage sale.

She came across 2 home repair books I’ve used in the past and asked me if we should keep them. “Yes”, I said, remembering one of the book’s usefulness when replacing a toilet. Then “Actually no”, I said, remembering that I haven’t looked at either of those books in years, having gone instead to YouTube.

Just the day before, I couldn’t figure out how to remove an old-style door knob from our basement, and I watched a young boy on YouTube show me how… with his small hands and an off-camera voice that could not have been more than 12 years old.

We are so lucky to live in an era where learning something new is always within our reach. Not just home repair, but new skills and new approaches to the way we think, learn, work, and play.

What are you currently trying to do that you couldn’t do before? How are you expanding your horizons?

“If you only do what you can do, you’ll never be more than you are.” ~ Shifu, Kung Fu Panda 3