Category Archives: Daily-Ink

New adjustable weights

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I’ve had adjustable weights for over 15 years and I have been using them extremely consistently for the past 6. Those weights can adjust from 5 to 50 lbs, in 5 lb increments, with the twist of the handle. Yesterday I got my new updated weights. These require twisting a dial on each side of the dumbbell, but they can adjust from 10 to 90 lbs, in 5 lb increments.

The reality is that I’m not going to be using the full 90lbs much, but I’m excited to be able to extend my home workouts beyond a 50 lb limit. To be able to have access to such a variety of weights in my tiny home gym is amazing. I know that I’m going to see some positive gains.

The one challenge is not getting too excited about the new weight possibilities, and pushing myself too hard. I don’t have anything to prove to anyone, and I think I’ve matured in my thinking enough not to try something stupid and hurt myself. Now I just need to prove this rather than just saying it.

The Saying – Hearing Gap

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“Communication is about what is received, not what is intended. If there is a gap between what you are saying and what they are hearing, you have to find a new way to say it.” -@JamesClear

This quote reminds me of the NLP saying, ‘The meaning of your communication is the response that you get.’

When there is a gap between what your message is and what a person hears, it’s easy to assume that the mistake is on the receiving end, but in reality, that becomes a game of pointing fingers and blame. The better thing to consider is how to improve the message. How do you convey intentions more clearly, in a way that the listener can better hear?

This acceptance of responsibility for the message empowers the speaker. This responsibility to better express what was miscommunicated allows for clarity to prevail. But this doesn’t mean you speak louder. It’s not about enunciating words more clearly. No, it about understanding the perspective of the other person. It’s about having empathy for the viewpoints of the person you are communicating with.

The gap between what you say and what is heard is ultimately your responsibility, because if the message you say is not the message that’s heard then who miscommunicated? If you don’t take at least part of the responsibility, then you are not solving the problem.

Decorating the Christmas Tree

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It’s officially the first time that I listen to Christmas music… while decorating the Christmas tree. Usually it’s a bit earlier than this, but our weekends have been a bit busy these past few weeks.

I still remember the first Christmas with both of my girls. I remember decorating my tree as a child. I remember the first year my wife and I bought matching Christmas decorations… a tradition we keep to this day, adding our daughters in as well.

We aren’t religious, and we don’t have a lot of family traditions, so little events like this feel pretty special.

Aliens, aliens everywhere

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Fake videos on social media, news about aliens living in our oceans, even congressional hearings… It seems everywhere I look there are reports about aliens from outer space.

Disregard the click bait title, and watch ‘The UFO Movie THEY Don’t Want You To See’.

It’s a full dose of scepticism, based on science. Whether you believe there are aliens visiting us, aliens too far away to visit, or that we are alone in the universe… it’s worth an hour and a half of your time to watch this documentary.

Fog and clarity

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I have a very short commute to work, 7-8 minutes. My drive there is almost all down hill. On the way, there is a specific hill that allows me to see part of the neighbouring city up on another hill. For the past couple days it has been foggy and that city has looked like it is in the clouds.

I look out at this skyline every work day unless clouds, fog, or rain hinder the view. I mostly don’t pay attention to what I’m seeing, it’s just a background view to my drive. Then something like this fog makes me look again. I notice that it looks like a city in the clouds, and I re-examine the skyline. I appreciate how pretty it is.

This makes me wonder what else I ‘miss’ because of familiarity? What don’t I appreciate enough? What do I not see, despite it being right in front of me?

And no, I’m not just wondering about the view.

You don’t know…

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Kid is in the office again, bad choices were made.

Behavior was an ‘F’ if given a letter grade.

But you don’t know the struggles, you don’t know the pain.

You can see some challenges, but not comprehend the drain.

How much do the hardships weigh? Not for you to decide.

Because as much as you know, there are limits to what they confide.

What they are actually going through is not what you see.

What’s hidden in the depths is often heaviest, like an iceberg at sea.

So avoid quick judgements, and give the benefit of doubt.

The issue at hand may not be what their story is about.

The troubles at home might be more than most can take.

Burdens so big that many others would break.

They made it to school, that alone was success.

Hard to see through the disruption and mess.

They create chaos, cause concern, and can be a pain.

Their file is thick with incidences, repeat offences again, and again.

But you don’t know the struggles, you don’t know the pain.

You can see some challenges, but not comprehend the drain.

Of a life so much harder than you can comprehend.

A life you would not swap with, or wish upon a friend.

Have some respect for the kid you’d never want to be.

The ones you would not trade lives with, saddled and unfree.

The pain, the unfairness, the hardships, you don’t know.

You don’t know, you don’t know, you don’t know.

Lap cat

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Our cat has gotten a lot more affectionate over the past couple years. He used to come on to our laps only if we gave his favourite brush a shake. The brush has a loose metal cap on the wooden handle and it rattles a bit when you shake it.

A few years back he would come to me and meow, waiting for me to pick up the brush, and I’d just pat my lap and wait. Most days he’d just leave, but sometimes he’d jump up and sit on my lap and I’d give him a good scratching.

Sometimes, like this morning, he sits facing away from me, and after a couple scratches he settles in. Other times he wants the full massage, faces me, and even gives me an affectionate nose bump.

He’s slowly gone from a cat that had to be coaxed onto our laps to a full time lap cat, jumping on our laps a few times a day. Honestly, I think I enjoy his lap time more than he does.

Hard to let go

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I had a very long and busy week last week, and that flowed into a long and busy weekend. I ended up with an empty tank, both physically and emotionally. I woke up Monday morning feeling awful and took the day off. My back ached, I felt like crap and I slept most of the day.

What I didn’t do was check my emails. I legitimately took a day off. Usually that means working from home, but I didn’t even open my laptop yesterday, and my phone stayed on ‘Do Not Disturb’. This morning I continued to feel bad and so I ended up taking a second day off (rare beyond a full back spasm or bad cold). Again, I stayed away from work much of the day, but I did put in a couple hours this morning to get some important communication out that was promised. And throughout the day I had a few things pull me into work mode via Teams and text messages.

And so I just looked at my email and I have 133 unread messages. That would have been higher without what I did today. This is the challenge of taking sick time… the work still comes your way. It’s like you take a sick day only when you absolutely need it, then you come back to so much work that you feel punished for taking care of yourself.

I’ve been working on this, trying to find balance. I will stay later at work and not look at email when I get home. I will add things to my ‘to do’ list at the end of the day and actually get home in time to make dinner. I will prioritize Teams, where my staff connect with me first and not look at email to start the day.

Still, it’s hard to let go. It’s hard to not sneak work in when I’m home. It’s hard to think, ‘I can deal with this tomorrow.’ But this morning I could feel it in me, ‘Take the day today and you won’t need another one before Christmas break… go back too soon and your battery is going to drain again, you aren’t healthy enough.’

So I did the unusual thing and listened to my own advice. Usually I don’t let go, I push through. I’m realizing that’s not just hard on my physical health but my mental health as well.

Do I have a lot of emails to get through? Yes. Does that add to my stress? Yes. But tomorrow I’ll attend to people first and email later… and I’ll catch up. The important thing is that I gave my body and mind the rest it needed and I’m 95% sure I’ll be back at work tomorrow.

Empty tank

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It’s rare for both my physical and social batteries to both hit empty at the same time. I’m there now.

Normally I can’t sleep for very long during the day without inducing a headache and feeling like I’ve messed up my sleep cycle. But I’ve slept for most of the day and I don’t think I’ll have an issue going to sleep tonight.

I’m in slow (re)charge mode.

Down speed, up incline

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A little nerdy workout reflection:

When I walk on a treadmill I usually go at 4 to 4.2 MPH, (I don’t bother clicking to km, miles is the default on my treadmill). For the past couple months I’ve been walking at 3.8 with a 34lb weight vest, and increasing the incline. But every time I increase to 7.5 or higher, I end up holding the handrails for most of the time I’m on those increased inclines.

Today I forgot to increase my speed from my 2 minute warmup at 3.6 and was able to do most of my walk at a 7.5° incline. I also did 4 minutes at 12.5°, but did hold the handrails then (actually the front rail so I’m not pushing down as much as levelling myself). Still the increase in my ability to maintain the 7.5 incline, for most of the 30 minute workout, and mostly without assistance, was impressive after feeling stuck trying to do this for so long.

I’ll do this a few more times then try at 3.7, then shortly after back to 3.8 MPH. But that’s still to come. For right now I am just surprised that this little adjustment made such a difference. It’s so important to mix things up a bit when you want to see gains in workouts.