Author Archives: David Truss

Year-end Message to Parents

Yesterday I sent an email to our students and parents with our updated calendar for next year, and all the year-end and September details they need. Then I sent the email below just to parents:

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Greetings Inquiry Hub Parents,

I just sent a message to you and your child, but I wanted to take a moment and send one just to parents. I have been thoroughly impressed with the resilience of our students during the pandemic. They have put on a brave face and held together at a time when it seems the entire world has gone a little mad. When I see news these days, I often wish the adults would act with the maturity of some of the students at our school! That said, this will be a summer when students might be trying to let loose a little and want to push the envelope as restrictions are lifted. Quite frankly, they deserve the opportunity to have a little freedom this summer… but what that looks like will be different for different students and their families.

One of the biggest challenges that I have found being a parent is that through the teen years there is no perfect balance of our kids wanting more freedom and us wanting less control. Our kids always think they are old enough to do the things they want to do, and we are always worried about letting them make more and more grown up choices on their own… Be it spending their money on things we don’t think are smart, staying out later than we think they should, and everything from alcohol use, to friendships, to boyfriends and girlfriends, to technology use. It’s not easy to figure out, and what’s more baffling is that what works for one kid, doesn’t work for another, even in the same household. Kids don’t come with instructions, and if they did, I am certain they would be translated from another language and hard to follow anyways. 😉

Below I’ve shared two resources that will take a total of 3 minutes of your time. Each will take a minute and a half, the first being a Facebook video and the second being a short read. I hope you enjoy them both, and maybe they might help you the next time you are faced with a challenging moment with one of your children.

It has been a year of loss and challenges for many, and at this time, I hope you all enjoy the time you have with your kids. Mine are 19 and 21 now, and while our relationships are wonderful, I do look back and wonder where the time went? I wonder what more I could have done with them while they were still part of a family under one roof. This is my way of saying, have a safe and wonderful summer with your kids, and as old as they think they are… they are still your kids, make the most of it!

Regards,

Dave 

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You are the roller coaster safety bar for your teen. 

By Josh Shipp

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Dear Mom and Dad, Please Stick With Me

by Helene Wingens (Source)

 

Dear Mom and Dad, 

Please stick with me. 

I can’t think clearly right now because there is a rather substantial section of my prefrontal cortex missing. It’s a fairly important chunk, something having to do with rational thought. You see, it won’t be fully developed until I’m about 25. And from where I sit, 25 seems a long way off. 

My brain is not yet fully developed

It doesn’t matter that I’m smart; even a perfect score on my math SAT doesn’t insulate me from the normal developmental stages that we all go through. Judgement and intelligence are two completely distinct things. 

And, the same thing that makes my brain wonderfully flexible, creative and sponge-like also makes me impulsive. Not necessarily reckless or negligent but more impulsive than I will be later in life. 

Please stick with me.

So when you look at me like I have ten heads after I’ve done something “stupid” or failed to do something “smart,” you’re not really helping.

You adults respond to situations with your prefrontal cortex (rationally) but I am more inclined to respond with my amygdala (emotionally). And when you ask, “What were you thinking?” the answer is I wasn’t, at least not in the way you are. You can blame me, or you can blame mother nature, but either way, it is what it is.  

At this point in my life, I get that you love me, but my friends are my everything. Please understand that. Right now I choose my friends, but, don’t be fooled, I am watching you. Carefully. 

Please stick with me. 

Here’s what you can do for me

1. Model adulting

I see all the behaviors that you are modeling and I hear all of the words you say. I may not listen but I do hear you. I seem impervious to your advice, like I’m wearing a Kevlar vest but your actions and words are penetrating. I promise. If you keep showing me the way, I will follow even if I detour many, many times before we reach our destination. 

2. Let me figure things out for myself.

If you allow me to experience the consequences of my own actions I will learn from them. Please give me a little bit of leash and let me know that I can figure things out for myself. The more I do, the more confidence and resilience I will develop.

3. Tell me about you.

I want you to tell me all the stories of the crazy things you did as a teen, and what you learned from them. Then give me the space to do the same.

4. Help me with perspective.

Keep reminding me of the big picture. I will roll my eyes at you and make all kinds of grunt-like sounds. I will let you know in no uncertain terms that you can’t possibly understand any of what I’m going through. But I’m listening. I really am. It’s hard for me to see anything beyond the weeds that I am currently mired in. Help me scan out and focus on the long view. Remind me that this moment will pass.

5. Keep me safe.

Please remind me that drugs and driving don’t mix. Keep telling me that you will bail me out of any dangerous situation, no anger, no lectures, no questions asked. But also let me know over and over and over that you are there to listen, when I need you. 

6. Be kind.

I will learn kindness from you and if you are relentless in your kindness to me, someday I will imitate that behavior. Don’t ever mock me, please and don’t be cruel. Humor me-I think I know everything. You probably did as well at my age. Let it go. 

7. Show interest in the things I enjoy.

Some days I will choose to share my interests with you, and it will make me feel good if you validate those interests, by at least acting interested.

One day when the haze of adolescence lifts, you will find a confident, strong, competent, kind adult where a surly teenager once stood. In the meantime, buckle in for the ride. 

Please stick with me. 

Love,

Your Teenager 

Return of the bad dream

I have this awful habit of returning to bad dreams, even after I wake up in the middle of the night. It happened last night at least twice. I was dreaming about a house renovation and the builders added some ridiculous contraption above our counter by the sink to dispense soap. In was an ugly monstrosity and it leaked.

I was trying to get this block-headed, massive worker to remove it, but he would only try to fix it. Then he’d move on and I’d have to call him back. This was one of many complaints I had that was not being fixed. During the dream, I woke up, and was relieved that it was just a dream. Then I shut my eyes again, and jumped right back into the stressful dream.

Why?

Why would I want to return to an awful dream where no matter what I did, things were not working out?

Then I woke again. This time, I’m mad at myself for going back into the same dream, and I tell myself to think of something different. Then I fall asleep and return to this never-ending, overly stressful dream.

This only seems to happen with stressful dreams. Good dreams are hard to get back into. Bad dreams continue. They live on past short wake-ups despite being aware of how silly they are, and how annoying they are.

If anyone has any suggestions to change this please let me know. I’m not a fan of waking up tired in the morning after a night of stressful dreams that could have ended 2-3 times had I just moved on after waking up.

Canada Day redefined

Usually this day is a day when I would wear red and white. I am an immigrant, but I am a proud Canadian. I have met many people who, like me, were not born in this country but fully adopted it as ‘home’, and like me many people feel like the adoption is mutual. Canadians accepts us as Canadian, despite being born abroad.

But today I will wear an orange shirt. Today I find it challenging to show pride in a country that secretly buried its children on Residential school grounds. Today I stand with the people who did not immigrate to Canada, but who were forced off their land, and forced to send their children to schools that abused them and attempted to colonize them, and stripped away their different languages and their cultures.

This isn’t the Canada I’ve grown to know and love, but it is every bit my Canada. This tragedy is not a history to remain buried, it is a history to face, and reconcile. I will wear red and white again on Canada at some point in the future, but to heal the wounds that run so deep, and generationally hurt so many people so deeply, I choose on this day to wear orange. I choose to say that every child matters… those that died because of racist segregation at residential schools, those that are dealing with generational trauma, those that hurt knowing the truth and are awaiting reconciliation.

I am not wearing orange in defiance, I am wearing it in unity, in solidarity. I am Canadian, and as a Canadian I am not someone who can be proud of the history of buried and forgotten children that have recently been discovered. As a Canadian I will wear orange to represent the Canada I want to live in, one where we do not forget our past, and we remember that every child matters.

Exit interviews

Yesterday was the last of school for students, and today is the last day for teachers. For the past couple years, we’ve had grads where the students came one at a time, and so part of that included them giving a short interview.

Instead of running credits on our iHub Annual we ran some clips from the interviews:

The 3 questions we asked were about favourite memories, advice for new students, and future plans.

Then yesterday afternoon I decided to interview two of our teachers who are leaving us next year. I don’t have the video ready, but a couple questions I asked them were, “What could other schools learn from us?” and, “If you could wave a magic wand, what would you change about Inquiry Hub?”

I really enjoyed my conversations with these teachers and they made me realize that I should be asking our grads more questions before they leave us. I also had a conversation with one of previous grads and mentioned I’d love to interview him as well. We can learn a lot from exit interviews, and I plan to take advantage of this in the coming years.

An Annual Event

Last night we held iHub Annual where we highlighted some student performances, our Ollie Awards, and our grads.

Our Ollie Awards are our awards based on our motto: Dream – Create – Learn, and students from all grades and all levels of academic achievement can receive them.

The show opens at 4:45 with a song co-written and performed by students for the annual. My speech to the grads is at 39:40, and our Valedictorian and Spirit of Inquiry award winner’s speech is at 49:17.

This is a presentation put together with so much student work, and it comes off quite polished. It is a celebration of the year that was, and for a few moments while watching it, I forgot about the challenges this year presented.

I can’t wait for the opportunity to run this event live again, but watching last night from the comfort of my home, I was thrilled to see students in the chat enjoying the show, and I was grateful that I wasn’t in a stuffy theatre on one of the hottest days on record.

It truly is remarkable to work in a school where students know that it’s their job to Dream and Create, as well as to Learn.

Heat wave

It’s supposed to get to 41°C (105.8°F) today. Yesterday was already a scorcher, but today will break records. I think our new above ground pool will get some use today after work, and I’m thankful that we have small window air conditioning units in our bedrooms, that we put in for just a few months a year.

Our district wisely cancelled school for students, because almost none of our schools have air conditioning and wearing a mask in a sweltering hot room with many others would be unbearable. I know my office will be uncomfortable, but I’ll probably move myself and my secretaries to a room that isn’t south facing with windows being in the sun all day.

I wonder how many more of these heat waves we’ll be getting in the coming years? Is this a blip or the start of a pattern? Global temperatures are rising, and we might have to get used to this… not that 41° is something anyone gets used to… it’s a temperature that you tolerate, moving from one artificially cool space to another.

Stay inside and stay cool.

Sunbathe then Sunscreen

Growing up in Barbados, I never wore sunscreen. It was something tourists wore so they wouldn’t burn. My mom would put some on my face when we would spend our summers on the beach, 6-7 hours a day, but other than that I didn’t wear it. I would turn golden brown and there was no doubt that I was local.

Now, after living in Canada for almost 45 years, I’m far more susceptible to burning and I need sunscreen. But I love the feel of the sun without a layer of slime on me. What I do is I always spend 20 to 40 minutes with no sunscreen on when I first get out in the sun. I literally sunbathe. Then, before I feel a burn, I put a nice high level sunscreen on. Sometimes it’s the little joys in life that mean a lot.

Ninety Nine point two percent

The Delta variant of Covid-19 is very contagious. We aren’t in the clear yet and coronavirus could still cause all kinds of issues for the us, if people don’t get vaccinated… but this isn’t just for the public good, it’s for you individually as well.

99.2 percent of over 18,000 recent Covid-19 deaths in the US have been people not fully vaccinated.

(link to TikTok)

Meanwhile, here in Canada, people are walking away from their second dose because it’s not the same vaccine… although the efficacy of this is not a concern.


(link to TikTok)

Here is more information on the Delta variant:

youtu.be/NmVQHK6RKQ8

Covid-19 will linger far more if everyone doesn’t do their part… and doing your part could save your life.

Mix and match vaccines

I got my 2nd vaccine dose last night. In the lineup I was asked, “First or second dose.”

“Second.”

“Which Vaccine did you get for your first shot?

“Pfizer.”

“We only have Moderna right now, are you ok with that?”

“Yes. I don’t care,” then I asked, “Are many people saying they do care?”

“Quite a few.”

This baffles me. The vast majority of people in BC had Pfizer as their first shot… a mRNA vaccine. Moderna is also an mRNA vaccine and there have not been any adverse affects from mixing. Also research on the efficacy of mixing vaccines seems very positive.

When I was asked which vaccine I got after sharing my first shot, I shared,

A good friend asked on Facebook: “Which one did you get Dave?”

My response, “The one I could get… I’m leaving it at that because I want to encourage others to do the same.”

Now I am sharing which ones I got because I would hope others will mix and match as needed to get vaccinated sooner, rather than delaying. We are getting much closer to living with some normalcy. The only mix and match stories that I could find that were negative were related to concerns when shots were mixed accidentally, months ago, before the positive research was out, and one article saying the short term effects might last a little longer.

Meanwhile, anecdotally, I’ve seen quite a few Pfizer/Pfizer vaccine recipients take more than a day off of work after getting their second vaccine, and most people that I know who have recently received Pfizer/Moderna have found the side effects are lasting less than 24 hours.

The other research I’ve seen suggests that mixing AstraZeneca with an mRNA vaccine seems to provide an even more robust immune response. So, I hope that no matter if you had AstraZeneca or Pfizer first, you would be willing to take Moderna second, rather than avoiding mixing and matching and delaying your second shot.

Early warning systems

I received word last night that a retired colleague and friend died yesterday. Cancer sucks. I know there will be a time in the future when we will be able to beat cancer consistently. Even before that, I think we will develop very early methods of detecting it. We might prick our fingers once a month and hundreds of health concerns might be detected early on, or maybe we just go to the bathroom and the toilet itself will detect concerns by doing a daily water test of our waste.

Essentially, early detection will help us detect the cancer early and we can knock it out before it kicks the hell out of us. This will likely happen before we actually beat cancer altogether… we just become really good at detecting it early. “Kill a snake when it is small,” my grandfather used to say.

My wife has an Apple Watch. In a decade or so, most of us will have a device like this that will monitor our health and do daily diagnostics for us. It will monitor our heart rate, blood pressure, temperature, sleep patterns, and a whole series of other biometrics that will create a baseline for us, and let us know when things aren’t at homeostasis. We will get medical feedback that will become an early warning system for us when our readings are off.

Imagine getting a little warning from a wearable device that tells us that our heart is doing something that has been detected in thousands of people a month or so before they got a heart attack, and suggesting you go for a checkup… and sharing this data with your doctor. Imagine learning that you have the flu before feeling the symptoms, and this device tells you to stay home and not spread your contagion.

We aren’t there yet, but I look forward to the day when we can count on an early detection device saving our lives, and extending the lives of those we love and care for.