Tag Archives: repairs

A five minute job it wasn’t.

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Yesterday I changed a toilet seat. It’s a 5 minute job… until I tried to do it. Unfortunately for me one of the old metal screws was rusted and even though the head could take both a flathead and the Robertson square head, they were both stripped in a matter of minutes of trying to use them. Then the plastic bolt got shredded and I was stuck. Exasperating the issue, the toilet is in a tiny alcove and I had to use my phone like a mirror just to see the bolt.

I spent way too long trying to somehow grip the screw head and undo the bold, leaning over the bowl and messing with the bolt I couldn’t directly see. It was futile, but I’m stubborn and continued to waste my time. But it actually wasn’t a complete waste because I shredded the old washer and that provided a little room between the toilet top and the screw head.

What was my next step? I took a new hacksaw blade and stuck it between the toilet top and the screw, and with a tiny 2 to 3-inch back-and-forth motion I cut the screw. It was a process that took over 10 minutes to do. The whole process left an absolute mess to clean up behind the toilet, and from start to finish I was there for close to an hour and a half.

I seem to be cursed when it comes to doing anything ‘handy’. It doesn’t matter what the job is, I end up taking much longer than expected to complete it. Eighteen times longer in this case. I made about 7 or 8 trips to the basement. At least it was only one trip to the hardware store to buy the seat, usually it ends up being 2-3 visits. I always end the job just relieved it’s over rather than having any sense of accomplishment.

My rule of thumb is, don’t start a a quick handyman job unless I have at least two hours to get it done, because for me there is no such thing as a 5-minute repair.

Handyman skills

We have a handyman helping us with a bathroom repair. We had to replace a broken medicine cabinet. When I removed the old one, which had a light fixture embedded in it, I found the electrical wire coming out of the wall, not a junction box. With that, and the desire to move an electrical plug that was way too close to the sink, (and no experience doing drywall), I decided it was going to be a job that would take me much too long… and honestly beyond my skills.

Our handyman has done such an amazing job. The amount of small things he’s done to make our bathroom better are things I would never have done. He noticed our bathroom door didn’t shut well and adjusted it. He fixed the ‘hack job’ drywall around our window and improved the window casing. And he made many minor adjustments that I just didn’t know needed to happen.

Each touch up has made a huge difference to our old bathroom which hasn’t had any kind of upgrade since we moved in 24 years ago. And again, I didn’t have the skills to do what he did, even if I had the time.

I have a friend who does all his own repairs. He sees an issue with his house and big or small he’s on it. I know these skills are learned, and I could do them too, but the learning curve would be huge for me, and I’d rather hire someone with those skills so that I’m not the one doing a hack job.

There is a lot of talk about AI taking away jobs, but people in trades, and with skills hand crafting things, will always have jobs to do. If you want to keep yourself employable in the long run, get yourself some handyman skills. There will always be people like me who would rather pay than learn the skills well enough to do an excellent job.

The not-so-handyman curse

I have this curse on me. It goes like this: Whenever I do a repair job, I will never go to the hardware store just once. More often than not, it’s three times per job.

Last weekend I replaced the insides of one of my toilets. Hardware store visit 1: buy the replacement items. Visit 2: a pair of pliers large enough to remove a large, seized nut and pick up a replacement flexible water hose that I should have bought in the first place. Visit 3: replace the flexible water hose with the same length hose but a wider screw nut… I thought it was a universal size, it wasn’t and I lost the 50/50 chance of picking the right size the first time.

Today it was replacing the silicone seal around the kitchen sink. I asked the guy at the store what I needed, and he recommended the best sealant to get. After doing all the prep I decided to look up how to get the best bead on my silicone line on YouTube. The last time I did this years ago, it was messy. Three videos later, the secret was obvious: use non-ammonia glass cleaner after putting the bead down, then the excess silicone won’t stick to my finger or smear on the counter or tiles. So, back to the store a second time to get the glass cleaner. I almost count this second visit as a win, since it was only two visits and not three.

I remember replacing a faucet not too long ago. I was so proud of myself for only needing one visit to the store, but once I started the water up, it constantly leaked. I purchased a faulty faucet. Back to the hardware shop I went and had to repeat the entire replacement a second time.

Cursed.

I am not a handyman. I know that attitude sucks. I know I should believe in myself. But I believe in the curse.., and the curse has got me. If anyone knows any voodoo to reverse the curse, I’m open to trying it.